Pink Ink

Valentine Chocolate Giveaway

2012-01-25T22:41:00.026-07:00

Pink Think: "All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt." - Charles M. Schulz

[Read to end of post to find out how you can win chocolate!]

I've been busy since after-Christmas helping my 14 year old son with the Feb. 4 Sweetheart Ball, a fundraiser for his 8th grade DC school trip. Many of my friends and family seem surprised that we are putting on such an ambitious event. Thing is, this is the kind of stuff I know how to do, having put on fundraisers & special events for a couple of decades now. It's a lot of work, but it's fun!

On behalf of my son, THANKS to everyone for buying tickets or donating, and to the following business sponsors:

Colleen Walch, photographer
Countryside Animal Clinic, Tooele
DJ MMiMMer - Anthony Johnson, Magic Mimer Entertainment
Petals-N-More, Grantsville
Natalie Ashby, violinist
RF Engraving, Grantsville
Rocky Mountain Physical Therapy, Grantsville
Soelberg's, Grantsville & Stansbury - ticket outlet
Tooele Transcript Bulletin

"Fun Dates" Silent Auction:

Ah Bella Bed & Breakfast, St. George - night's stay in Honeymoon Suite
The Anniversary House, Cedar City - night's stay
Casa del Rey, Grantsville - gift certificates
Depot Grill, Cedar City - gift card
Fred Carter - day sail & lunch
Jamos Chicago-Style Pizza, Stansbury Park - gift card
Johnny's, Lava Hot Springs, ID - gift certificate
Iso Vernon - guided horseback trail ride
Mountain Mayhem Rental, Lava Hot Springs, ID - hot springs passes
Maverik, Grantsville - gas cards
Megaplex Theaters - movie tickets
Red Robin Gourmet Burgers, Valley Fair Mall - gift card
Custom Cakes by Stef - custom cake gift card
Thanksgiving Point - passes

***
To celebrate Valentine's Day, and the fact that the Sweetheart Ball is almost here, one lucky commenter on this blog post OR my Facebook event page will win chocolate, mmm.

To enter, answer the question: "How did you and your sweetheart meet?" Deadline: 11:59 p.m. MST, February 13, 2012. US Postal Addresses only.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Crazy Cooking Adventure

2012-01-05T12:47:00.007-07:00

Pink Think: "Food is for eating, and good food is to be enjoyed... I think food is, actually, very beautiful in itself." - Delia Smith

A rare treat: taking my sister out to lunch

I am embarking on a crazy cooking adventure on Saturday. I am hosting a Philippine fiesta as a going-away for a couple who will be serving an LDS church mission in the Philippines. Armed with all these internet recipes, I will be cooking for two days, I kid you not...all my favorite Filipino dishes like:

sago and gulaman drink
lumpia (egg roll)
chicken curry
chop suey (mixed vegetables)
adobo
sinigang (pork and tamarind soup)
kare-kare (oxtail soup)
beef kaldereta (stew)
siopao (pork buns)
leche flan (caramel custard)

I am nervous and excited all at the same time. It'll be yummy!

***
Another reason I'm excited to throw this party is because my sister is visiting from Ireland. And I wanted to make a yummy spread before she heads back to the Emerald Isles. My brother, who lives in the Philippines, was also here for the holidays.

Fun times!

"How to Win" a Movie Ticket Giveaway

2012-01-03T07:12:00.013-07:00

Pink Think: "As in every business you have to always ask yourself what your product is and the best way to deliver it." - Mark Cuban

[This contest is CLOSED. Thanks everyone for participating!]

My husband laughs when I get excited coming up with business ideas, or branding strategies. Book series ideas and titles, too. Probably my dad's entrepreneurial bent rubbing off on me. To me, the fun is coming up with a concept, the successful execution is the icing.

Recently, I entered a local business concept contest. I didn't win, but had a ball. I was, however, humbled to learn that the best business ideas which bowl over investors aren't necessarily the shiny, pretty ones, but the ones that have a solid plan and numbers behind them. For instance, my presentation involved a fun "story" but when I was asked how much the building would cost, I answered, "A lot."

Lesson learned.

***
Speaking of entrepreneurs, I have the pleasure of posting a Q&A with Mark Cuban, an American business magnate and investor. He is the owner of NBA's Dallas Mavericks, Landmark Theatres, and Magnolia Pictures, as well as the chairman of the HDTV cable network HDNet. He is a savvy blogger and now, author, with the recent launch of his eBook How to Win at the Sport of Business.

He's also offering two Landmark Theatre movie tickets to a lucky commenter. Comment by 11:59 p.m. Monday, January 16, to be entered into the drawing. Click here for Landmark Theatre locations near you.

***
Q. Many moms who want to start a business are struggling to make ends meet but you argue in your book, that some of the best businesses took little to nothing to start. Why do you encourage entrepreneurs not to wait for financing to start?

A. Because effort is always more important than cash.

Q. There are many young moms who are just beginning their lives and can relate to you when you said you were sharing a small apartment with 6 people and sleeping on the floor. How can someone keep their eye on the prize when they’re living on Ramen noodles?

A. Who cares how you are living today? I loved every minute of living in that dump. The low rent and utilities and eating Mac n’ Cheese all the time allowed me to afford the startup of my business. Instead of paying myself much, I could put it in to my business.

Q. You knew Michael Dell of Dell Computers before he was the Michael Dell. What can you say about being nice to people on the way up?

A. It's a whole lot easier to be nice to people than not to be. There are times when you have to be tough, but a smile not only goes further, it makes you feel better about yourself as well.

Q. You encourage entrepreneurs not to hire a public relations firm, Mark. How did you get the word out about your eBook?

A. I tweeted, posted on Facebook, [used] Google Plus and responded to emails. Nothing more.

Q. One of my favorite parts of your book, How to Win at the Sport of Business, that completely broke my heart was when your ex-secretary robbed your first company of over $83,000, leaving you only $2000 after a year of work. If there are moms out there that have lost everything, what advice do you have for them to pick themselves back up?

A. Keep working. Don’t feel sorry for yourself because it won’t do any good.

Q. Looking back, destiny seemed to lead you from one opportunity where you would learn a life skill to another. Do you believe in fate or luck and how much of that has to do with hard or smart work?

A. There were a lot of things I didn’t write about. So, it’s not necessarily a direct jump from one skill to another. Starting and running a business can be a lot of long hours. You just have to get after it and not let up.

Q. You were seemingly unfocused and not sure about what you want to do when you were younger. What advice do you have to parents who are worried if their child will ever be somebody?

A. No amount of worrying is going to change things for them. They have to figure it out for themselves. At some point, it is theirs to do or not do.

***
Thank you, Mark. Mark Cuban's e-book, How to Win at the Sport of Business, is available anywhere eBooks are sold.

Comment by 11:59 p.m. MST Monday, January 16, to be entered into the drawing.

CONGRATULATIONS to our winner, Meredith M!

Why I'm helping my son get to Washington DC

2011-12-31T13:45:00.007-07:00

My 14 year old son, Wesley, has been working hard towards a dream: going to Washington DC with his 8th grade class in June 2012. He’s been babysitting, doing odd jobs, writing short stories, anything a 14 year old can do…and now in the final stretch, he’s putting on a dinner & dance fundraiser on February 4. For $25/person, guests will enjoy a catered dinner, string serenade, dancing, and a keepsake digital photo.

Going on an educational trip to DC with his class will be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for Wesley. It was for me, when I was 20. I spent three months there as an intern for Utah Senator Jake Garn, and it changed my life forever. There is nothing like seeing memorabilia first-hand from our Founding Fathers’ fight for our freedoms. The experience made me grateful to live in America. While there, I also joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Thus, DC holds a special place in my heart, and that’s why I am using all my special-event know-how in helping Wesley achieve his goal.

Thanks to everyone for buying tickets/donating, and just in general being very supportive of and encouraging Wesley!

New Year, New Dress Giveaway

2011-12-20T07:22:00.018-07:00

Pink Think: "New Year's Day is every man's birthday." - Charles Lamb

UPDATE: This contest is CLOSED. Thanks to everyone who entered! Scroll down for the winner.

The wonderful folks at Shabby Apple, an online boutique of women's dresses, asked me if I would pick an item from their website and do a giveaway.

Twist my arm.

I happily picked the Bali Ha'i dress above. It not only makes me think of the tropics, it comes in a yummy plum hue!

Best of all, I just received my own Bali Ha'i dress today. It felt like Christmas...oh, wait, it IS almost Christmas! For the record, the Bali Ha'i dress is everything I imagined it to be. It's a gorgeous color, the neckline is pretty, and the fit is fabulous. I love how it flatters the figure, but at knee-length, it's modest.

Thanks, Shabby Apple!

***
Would YOU like to win the dress above, in YOUR size?

TO BE ELIGIBLE FOR THE DRAWING, YOU MUST:
1. "Like" Shabby Apple's Facebook page
2. Check out their website, then leave a comment on this post as to which Shabby Apple dress/item is your favorite.
3. Have a US shipping address (if you win, I'll get your address & size from you then).

HOW TO ENTER: Please leave a comment that you "like" Shabby Apple on Facebook. Also, tell me what your favorite item is on their website.

FOR AN EXTRA ENTRY: Follow my blog (tell me if you are a follower)

DEADLINE: New Year's Eve, 12/31/11 Midnight EST

***
WE HAVE A WINNER!

Gift of Niceness

2011-12-10T08:28:00.008-07:00

Pink Think: "It's nice to be important, but it's important to always be nice." - Alyssa Milano

The other day, while I was waiting for a turn at Parent-Teacher conference, I had an interesting encounter with a mom. I got up for a second to talk to another teacher, and returned to my spot, to hear her telling her child that they are next, so to be patient. I said, "Oh, I'm next."

She glared at me. "I've been waiting here longer."

Now normally I wouldn't have pushed it, but I was trying to get to my older daughter's basketball game, so I said, "Do you have someplace to be? I have a basketball game to be to, so that's why it would be helpful if I could go first."

No reply. She wouldn't look at me, but I could tell she was mad. She kept punching the keys on her iPhone, her whole body rigid.

When the teacher became available, I took my turn. Just two minutes with the teacher and my son. On my way out, I made a point to smile and tell the mom and her daughter thank you. She looked surprised, and smiled a little smile back. That was enough for me.

It made me think of the times when I get mad at people for whatever rudeness or inconsideration I imagine them to have inflicted upon me.

I've decided it's a lot more pleasant to just smile and let it roll off my back. I'm not condoning rudeness. But guess what, I don't have to be rude, too. In fact, being nice feels pretty darn good.

***
I've found myself smiling a lot lately.

I chalk this up to a conscious decision I made the start of the season to be nice. That's it: be nice. I'm not doing it so I can be on Santa's nice list. I guess you could say I'm doing it because I want to give others the gift of niceness.

A smile. An encouraging word. A friendly hello.

I'm nowhere near done with my Christmas shopping list, but the Spirit is there. I'm grateful. Just thinking about it makes me smile once again.

Merry Christmas, friends.

Meow-gazine Writing Tip #1 First-Person POV

2011-12-08T07:53:00.013-07:00

Pink Think: "Using a first-person narrator is simply a matter of hearing the voice inside yourself." - James Lee Burke

I'm in the thick of revising a nonfiction piece for a local magazine. It's been a great learning process for me. With my editor's permission (and some kitty help), I will be sharing his editor notes on this blog.

Meow-gazine Writing Tip #1 First-Person POV

First-person will work, but only if your presence is integral to the story. If you're just a dispassionate, outside viewer, the value of your first person narrative may fall into question. Your presence in the story must have a reason. Anything less and it may come across as an intrusion. Did you experience any "ah ha" or cathartic moments during the interview? Did you learn anything from them while writing? Did they inspire you as they have inspired others?

Ireland, no. Blessings, yes.

2011-11-22T09:38:00.014-07:00

Pink Think: "When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around." - Willie Nelson

illustration by David Castillo Dominici on freedigitalphotos.net

I was sitting with the family and I thought, with a little pang of guilt that I haven't been able to give my kids things that other moms have. Trips abroad, mainly.

I don't really deserve to gripe, but I still feel sad that when my daughter says she wants to go visit my sister in Ireland, I can't just say, "Well, let's go then, shall we?"

I think about our Christmas list and wonder if we'll have enough without going into credit card debt. Still, the fact we have a house we haven't defaulted our mortgage on, and three cars in the driveway, food in our fridge, and heat in the winter - we are better off than some people.

It's hard to remember this when I tell my 16 year old that so-and-so has been to this-country- and-that, and a light in her eyes burns. Admiration and envy, and every emotion in between.

Someday I will make a list of the intangible blessings. But today my brain isn't cooperating. My heart wants to believe there's good in the world from my decision to stay home with the kids. That I did the right thing recently not applying for certain full-time jobs because if I get any of them, I will not be able to send my kids off to school, greet them when they get home, take them to piano lessons, and be there for them when they need me during the day.

Earlier in the week, I hugged my youngest and asked her half-jokingly if it was worth it to her that I was a stay-at-home-mom even though I couldn't get her a fill-in-the-blank. She gave me this funny look, not really answering (I didn't really expect one) and let me hug and kiss her, then ran off.

I hope my kids realize that even without the trips to Ireland, they have a mom that loves them very much.

***
Happy Thanksgiving to you, my friends! What blessings are YOU grateful for?

Wanderlust

2011-11-18T11:44:00.007-07:00

Pink Think: "The World is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page." - St. Augustine photo by Grant Cochrane on freedigitalphotos.net

The fun thing with journalism is it gives you access to interesting people doing interesting things. I just finished a profile on a girl who has traveled extensively through Europe, and she's only 18.

Throughout my interview with her, I kept thinking of my own daughter, who, at 16, has developed a burning wanderlust. I've told my daughter I can relate to her completely, because at that age (and still up to now) I absolutely wanted to travel.

When I was 15, I came to the U.S. and that experience made me the person that I am today. It's given me a different perspective, has helped me in adapting to different situations and has added depth to my writing.

I want my daughter to have the same chance of traveling and experiencing different cultures.

***
What about YOU? Have you traveled outside the US? Where have you been? And where do you want to go?

Opportunities

2011-11-15T13:30:00.006-07:00

Pink Think: "The world is all gates, all opportunities, strings of tension waiting to be struck." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

photo by Salvatore Vuono at freedigital.net

Today my mind is on the lyrics of a song from the 70s. It goes something like this:

Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the places life's been showing you?
Where are you going to?
Do you know?

Whoever picked the month of November for NaNoWriMo - the challenge of writing 50k words in 30 days - was a sadist. Come to think of it, though, what month isn't busy? I am about 15k into my story and if I stay motivated, I might be able to crank out 5k on some days to give me a cushion. Just to say I did it.

*sigh*

Meanwhile, a friend of mine critiqued a manuscript I'd had laying around. She sent me a 4 page email that told me what she loved about it and things she suggested. And I must say, her comments were spot-on brilliant.

I want to fix it. I owe it to the story.

But there's this little thing called NaNo. Should I let go of the fun story I've written so far that might have more commercial value? Or should I resurrect the old mss and fix it up, hope I can fix it in some coherent fashion, and come up with a better story?

I'm also facing a crossroads regarding two potential jobs, with their pluses and minuses. It couldn't come at a crazier time, when I want to hunker down and make a go of my novels. And yet my life stage is such I can't be complacent. As much as I want to just sit in a corner of my room, get in a dream state, and write fiction with the relatively low stress/flexibility of a freelance journalism career, I do have to venture out. My success (read:income) at another job will create more opportunities for me and my family.

When my brain feels like it's going to explode, I try to think that all these are Opportunities.

Yay for opportunities! But it's still not easy to choose.

***
What about YOU? What choices are you facing today?

I Wasn't Going To...

2011-11-01T10:02:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "You don't start out writing good stuff. You start out writing crap and thinking it's good stuff, and then gradually you get better at it. That's why I say one of the most valuable traits is persistence." - Octavia Butler
...but I opened a file in the wee early morning hours of November first and wrote 1,687 words towards a new novel.

I love me a crazy challenge.

Let the madness begin!

***
Are YOU NaNoWriMo'ing? Be my buddy! I'm "Pink Ink".

That Sellable Idea

2011-10-11T08:03:00.004-06:00

Pink Think: "I begin with an idea and then it becomes something else." - Pablo Picasso

photo from Freephoto by winnond

The other day, I visited a Renaissance man. He is a number-cruncher by trade but also does fine art photography.

The day I stop in, his office/studio faces out into the cold light of a chilly autumn afternoon, classical music playing softly in the background. He exudes energy, constant motion. I want to visit longer, but I can tell he has things to do, places to be. So I don't impose. I visit only for as long as I need to. As I always have in the past, I am impressed by his glamorous-seeming life, captured in his photos. We are picking out a photo he could donate to a silent auction I am helping with. France. Scotland. Virgin Islands. I ask him what sells traditionally.

He laughs. "I've been doing this now for years," he says, "and I still don't know."

We pick out a familiar European landmark. If I can recognize it, then I am sure others will, too.

***
Lately, I write two or three op-eds before deciding on one to submit. Sometimes I can't get to what I am trying to say unless I draft it first. When I feel strongly about something, and am clear on where I stand, the op-ed writes itself. I could labor over an op-ed for a day, toss it aside, and then write a piece in ten minutes flat. The latter usually gets sent to my editor.

My freelance workload has been steadily increasing. I have two stories due by month's end, and of course my op-ed columns. Trying to balance all that with a fundraiser in early November. One of the stories is a "mini-memoir" for a magazine. Although the amount of work is daunting, I am excited to have a bigger canvas on which to draw an interesting life.

Funny how, as a journalist, my job is not just to write the story, but to find story angles which resonate with me and which hopefully will resonate with others, too.

That sellable idea.

***
How do YOU come up with your sellable ideas?

Book Review: Fall by Jennifer Hurst

2011-09-28T08:54:00.004-06:00

Pink Think: "What terrified me will terrify others; and I need only describe the spectre which had haunted my midnight pillow." - Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley

Summary: Women and construction shouldn't mix. At least, that is what the client, Mr. Blackwell, thinks when twenty-one year old Julia D. Halstead is promoted to project manager to convert a turn-of-the-century schoolhouse into a bed and breakfast. However, the schoolhouse contains a dark secret that has been hidden for nearly a hundred years. A secret that will unleash the Furies of Hell and cause the Angels in Heaven to weep as ethereal brothers, Matthew and Nathan, battle over Julia's very soul.

My two cents: This book made me think of Stephanie Meyer's Twilight and Becca Fitzpatrick's Hush, Hush. Love triangle, brooding love interest, paranormal twist...what's not to like about this book? It's also set in Butch Cassidy land, which makes for a fun read for a Utahn like me.

We once considered buying a turn-of-the-century house, and I actually thought it would make a spooky setting for a story. So when I saw this book's plot summary, I decided to give it a try. I'm glad I did.

You can purchase the book here and check out the author's website here.

Disclaimer: I received a free e-book in exchange for my honest review.

***
Let's play a little game. In the comments, tell me what spooks YOU.

Outlasting Life

2011-09-21T11:07:00.003-06:00

Pink Think: "The great use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it." - William James

photo by Salvatore Vuono on freedigital.net

Slowly chipping away at revising, when I find time between my fall projects. My manuscript is looking dramatically different than when I started. I am focusing more on the setting, which makes me ache a little with homesickness for the Philippines. That's a good thing, right?

Thanks to the fabulous K.M. Walton, my first 500 words got a helpful critique from her Kindness contest.

Feeling good...just got done with some things on my to-do list, namely:

-Edited a song
-Wrote a 1200-word feature on bus drivers

The song had been on my back burner for a while, and it felt good to finally send it off to my client. I love writing poetry, and songwriting makes the experience even richer, to see the lyrics go with the melody.

The feature worried me a little, because we had a huge horse show last week, where my two girls competed. I thought for sure I would have so much down time I could just write while the girls were between things. Right. So instead, we did a lot of waiting and watching, but it turned out okay. It recharged my brain cells so when I got back to work on Monday, I was ready to tackle my bus driver story. Bus drivers are amazing, btw. I can't even keep track of the road let alone a bus-load full of 80 teenagers.

At the horse show, a horse died. Probably of a heart attack, they figured. It seized up at the end of a ride at the poles and fell right on top of its teenage rider. Earlier in the day, there was a big to-do over a mis-measurement between poles. The horse's death just put everything in perspective for me. Suddenly, some ticky-tack annoyances seemed trivial. The rider got checked out at the hospital and was fine. Somebody donated a 9 year old mare to her by day's end.

There are lots of things worth doing in life, and then there are some trivial things that just mark time. My hope is I am doing the best I can on things that matter the most. That I am writing things I truly want to write about. What an opportunity we've all been given.

Chaste Romance

2011-08-30T07:24:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "A historical romance is the only kind of book where chastity really counts." - Barbara Cartland

photo by dan at freedigital.net

Just read Janette Rallison's novel Just One Wish. My oldest had raved about it before, and I finally got around to reading it. What a delight. I laughed and got choked up all at the same time; it's sweetly romantic in a believable way (amazing to pull it off when the main characters have known each other for only about 24 hours). Okay, so maybe parts of it were a bit over-the-top (animal wrangling disguise) but that was part of the fun.

Here's another amazing book: the graphic novel Page by Paige by Laura Lee Gulledge. Each page illuminates a truth, in such a fresh and novel way. Example: cuddling a cat makes Paige feel like she has all these comforting arms around her. My oldest loved the illustrations so much she brought out her watercolors and did up a few little pieces in homage of this book.

Score! Two books that have made me a happy reader. (I have breezed through a number of books lately that I started but didn't finish) Plus, they're books my daughter and I can enjoy together - Bonus!

Okay, on to today's (somewhat related) post!

***
I have been revising a historical novel. It's turned out completely different than when I started. My first draft, the female protagonist is more socially confident, more coquettish, more aggressive. This time, my protagonist holds back more and wants to be chaste.

I think the second version, with her not being as sexually aggressive, makes her more sympathetic, and is in keeping with sexual mores of turn-of-the-century Philippines (of course, that's what I thought too about 19th century America, but Luxe turned that expectation on its head). I wonder if modern readers would appreciate a female protagonist that tries to be chaste?

Would YOU?

4-0...Whoa!

2011-08-24T08:31:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "Life begins at forty." - Walter B. Pitkin

Art by digitalart from freedigitalphotos.net

Forty sounds so old.

My husband bristles when I say this because he's older than me. But I just mean that I never pictured myself being 40. It almost sounds...responsible. :-)

And now here it is. Bring on the cotton candy and party hats!

To Self-Publish Or Not

2011-08-12T01:49:00.005-06:00

Pink Think: "Yeah, now we publish whenever we feel like it." - Glenn Danzig

photo by zole4 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

At some point this summer, I thought I would at least look into what it takes to self-publish. I bought two books on self-publishing, read them and decided to stick to trying to get an agent first.

There are some writers out there that make self-publishing sound easy, but in reading between the lines, I am intimidated by (1) the cost of formatting the manuscript for e-readers and (2) the technicalities of publishing. Not to mention I cannot say with 100 per cent confidence that my manuscripts are the best they can be.

I started revising one of my novels lately, and each chapter has changed dramatically from my second draft. It's a lot of work, but I feel like I am stripping it of superficial layers and getting to the meat of my story. At least I have a framework to work with. I know my plot for the most part (looking ahead, some details will change dramatically).

When I feel like it's in its best possible shape, I'm going to re-weigh my options then.

***
Have YOU looked into self-publishing? Or have self-published? Why or why not? What was your experience like? Do share.

Reflection of Who I Am?

2011-08-08T09:26:00.011-06:00

Pink Think: "People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Photo by graur codrin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Are my op-eds a reflection of who I am as a person?

I've been thinking of the opinion columns I have been writing over the last four months. The short answer, of course, is yes. Unlike fiction, an opinion column is just that, my opinion. It sums up what I think, how I feel about an issue.

I'm not always opinionated in social situations. Although I relish an occasional debate now and then with my hubby, in general I don't engage in verbal sparring with my neighbors.

I scoured a newspaper editorial page the other day; I discovered something interesting. I noticed that national columnists like Charles Krathaummer and the like will very rarely put themselves in their column. Say they are writing about immigration. Their column will contain statistics, facts, but feelings, hardly.

I feel strongly about immigration because I am a first-generation American immigrant. So I crafted this piece and chewed on my fingernails because I was afraid I might have come on too strong. But when I think of that issue, I cannot separate my own personal experiences from my opinion.

Will I ever get to the point when I don't worry so much anymore what people think, so long as I am honest in my opinion, back my piece with accurate sources, and don't name-call or attack people?

When I expressed my concern that I might be too shrill, my editor said the more opinionated I am, the more enjoyable my pieces are.

***
Who do YOU enjoy reading? Someone who comes right out and says what they think? Or someone who tries to balance all views and lets the reader decide for themselves? Do you like opinion columns where the writer gets up close and personal about a certain issue?

Kindness of a Stranger

2011-07-15T09:14:00.009-06:00

Pink Think: "Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver." - Barbara de Angelis

photo: my beloved guitar

Just for fun, I googled my name today and found out through a website that my estimated earnings this year is $44,000 (Dear hubby - Wouldn't that be great?). Wow, that was just weird. I have no idea how they estimated it. But it sounds good! (as in, I wish!)

I used to blog semi-anonymously on the web, until the day I decided if anyone wanted to contact me so badly, they can. I mean, I'm in the phone book anyway.

Yesterday, I talked to someone that did track me down from an essay I wrote.

***
It's not as creepy as it sounds. The person was an elderly gentleman who plays on a country band in Idaho. He called and left me a message that he read my essay and wanted to talk to me.

So you know what I am talking about, read my esssay, From limelight to Christ's light.

He suggested I consider forming a band with other like-minded people. He said he's found a lot of joy in performing with a country band that mainly sings at Senior Centers and private church parties.

For years, he put his guitar under his bed. He said I shouldn't do that for too long. He said there's music out there that is uplifting, especially old-fashioned songs.

The "putting the instrument under the bed" part resonated with me. I recently stowed my guitar in its case. It's still there, but not actively being used. And I know I will again, someday, but for now, there are other things taking up my creative energies.

A season for everything.

I thanked him for his kindness in seeking me out and encouraging me.

This morning I woke up to the cat lightly running up my guitar case. And I remembered a stranger's kind words.

It's All In The Eyes

2011-07-13T08:55:00.006-06:00

Pink Think: "The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides." - Audrey Hepburn

Finally, I got to finish the eyes on my "Arabian Princess" yesterday in art class. It's been so fun to go from this

to this

Will still be working on it over the next few weeks with clean-up, acrylic details and background.

What I've learned so far (which can be applied to writing too):

1. Have an end result in mind.
2. Getting there is an adventure.
3. You can always erase (revise).
4. Patience. Patience. Patience.
5. Don't expect perfection the first time around.
6. Create something that excites you from the get-go.
7. If you've always wanted to draw (or write), you can learn by doing it!

Small Town Fourth of July

2011-07-05T08:31:00.004-06:00

Pink Think: "My early childhood memories center around this typical American country store and life in a small American town, including 4th of July celebrations marked by fireworks and patriotic music played from a pavilion bandstand." - Frederick Reines

(c) Jewel Allen

Had a wonderful Fourth of July, did you?

Started out cheering on our two oldest in a 5k run. I was going to be in it, but I chickened out at the last minute. I didn't want to be last, but now I know I should have done it anyway. Maybe next year.

Walked a few blocks to Main Street to add another chair to our saved spot for the parade while my husband took the kids where they needed to be. I love being able to just walk and feel safe, and talk to people I know along the way.

And the parade - a child's delight! I am happy to admit I get in there like the rest of the kids, calling out for parade entries to throw candies and the promo shirt I never wear but give to my husband. Fun to see neighbors and friends in the parade. Afterwards, we picnicked at outdoor tables of a now-defunct restaurant which was right on main street. Got a few curious looks, just like that one time when I had the kids walk through a drive-through.

Just took it easy in the afternoon. I could have written more towards my WIP, but I chose not to. I was on holiday, after all. The family watched Around the World in 80 Days starring Jackie Chan, and I loved it. He's so funny and the fighting/getaway scenes were exciting. Someday, my books will be turned into funny and wondrous movies like that! :-)

We paused the movie to catch the fireworks. Found a spot that was perfect viewing. As the fireworks started, exploding directly above us without any of the smoke - such a grand feeling!

All in all a perfect small town July Fourth celebration.

Progress

2011-07-01T02:18:00.009-06:00

Pink Think: "Success is steady progress toward one's personal goals." - Jim Rohn
"Arabian Princess" - my art work in progress

In art class my Arabian Princess
got highlights in her hair
In 4-H practice I backed
the trailer fairly straight
In my new novel I got from zero
to seven thousand words

It's like climbing a rock wall;
finding another foot and hand hold
and boosting yourself up
so you are closer to the top

Sometimes it's hard because
summer is like a brazen
houseguest who lounges
in a hammock while you are trying
to work some and not give up on
goals completely

Rain Mixed With Sunshine

2011-06-20T06:53:00.009-06:00

Pink Think: "I always like to reveal the fact that the emperor has no clothes. And children are best at that. They teach us how to see the world in that sense. They are without artifice; they see it for what it is. I am drawn to that ruthless honesty." - Mira Nair

Photo by ilco on stock.xchng

Living with a teenager is like rain drizzling through a ray of sunshine. A combination of moods which shouldn't coexist, but which do and can be both perplexing and beautiful.

Last week, I blogged about my oldest's response to a short story I had written. About the same time, I had shown her the start to a historical fantasy I was writing. She politely suggested a ton of changes. I thanked her and wondered if I should keep writing the story.

A few days later, I pulled myself together and rewrote the story based on her suggestions. I changed the setting, put in more exposition and revved up the fantasy part earlier. When I showed it to her once again, she said she liked it. She daydreams about stories like "Treasure Island" and she was already starting to daydream about this one. And wasn't that a good thing?

Then she said, "Tell me what happens in the story."

"Don't you want to be surprised?" I asked.

"Well, yeah... so write it then."

This isn't the first time I've thought how wonderful it would be if a story would come to me just in one whole, and get it down on paper right away. But as I am learning in art class, writing a novel requires patience as I put down layer upon layer upon layer, blending colors in between.

"Good job being teachable," my husband said when I told him what happened.

I am just grateful for an honest teenager.

Dark Places

2011-06-14T08:30:00.010-06:00

Pink Think: "Readers respond to every genre intensely, if it's a genre that appeals to them. Again, who can say why anyone enjoys horror and dark fantasy? If I can't answer the question for myself, I wouldn't dream of trying to answer it for others." - Laurell K. Hamilton

photo from stockxchng

I wasn't going to post about this. But (belatedly) seeing the Wall Street Journal article criticizing YA books as "dark and depraved" made me think of a recent experience I had with my 15 year old daughter.

***
A couple of weeks ago, I stayed home to write a short story which I could enter into a contest due at midnight that day. When my family came home, I proudly showed "The Tenant" to my husband on my laptop.

As some of you might know, I have a penchant for writing horror stories, and "The Tenant" is probably the grittiest, darkest I've ever written. It is the story of a young woman who is pregnant out of wedlock, who refuses to have an abortion, and who has moved in to a haunted house. She wonders what is behind a closed door at the end of the hallway and goes to investigate. What she discovers comes as an emotional and physical shock.

I chomped at the bit waiting for my husband's reaction, which was a polite, "Very interesting."

"Good interesting or bad interesting?" I wheedled.

"Geez, I'm late for an appointment," he said. Or something smacking of avoidance.

So I thought I'd try it on for size on my 15 year old. She usually reads my short stories. Horror is not her genre, I knew, but I wanted to see what she thought. I watched her face. Absorbed, wide-eyed. She read to the end, then re-read to another part.

Again, a polite response. Later, in the truck, she said, "Why did you write that story?"

"When I was young," I said, "my family lived in a house like in my story, and there was a room at the end of the hall everyone said was haunted. I always tried to imagine what was in that room, and this was my way of doing it."

She referred to a couple of words in my story I'd used, "whore" and "slut". "Why did you put them in there?"

I felt like I was seeing her for the very first time. My kids are sweet. We hardly watch TV. A lot of things shock them and I hadn't been sensitive to this. There was nothing explicit or graphic in my story, but I suppose you could say the content and some language was "mature." "I don't know where that came from," I said. "I just wrote what came to me."

"I felt violated reading the story," she said. "And now, I feel like I can't erase it from my mind."

***
Her reaction, brought on by something I had thoughtlessly tossed in her lap, weighed me down all day. It made me wonder what my obligation as a writer is to my readers. Was there merit to dark and gritty literature? Even though it reflected reality? Or the darker seams of life?

As a mom, I can relate to the mom depicted in the WSJ article who walks in the bookstore feeling depressed at the dark themes evident in YA book covers and synopses, wondering what, if any, books kids can read. There is "happier" fare, but they are few and far between. Does this reflect the fact that writers usually write to exorcise some dark past?

As a writer, I vowed I would be more careful what, of my writing, I have my children read. I never did submit that story. I'm still trying to decide what my goal as a writer is. Is it to illuminate the dark places of life, or to darken the light places?

Art Class

2011-06-01T23:24:00.015-06:00

Pink Think: "Every production of an artist should be the expression of an adventure of his soul." - W. Somerset Maugham

My May 31st initial sketch

This time, I am a student, too.

Summer for our family the past three years has meant art lessons for the kids. This year, my youngest started art lessons so I decided I would join in on the fun.

Our teacher lives in a uniquely beautiful home. Her mailbox has pansies painted on it, her cats have an outdoor screened room, she has a colorful outdoor deck with turquoise cushions. This year, she has a tree stump decorated with red, blue, green bottles. Next time, I'll ask permission to take a photo of it so I can show you how amazing it is.

When I grow up I want to be like her!

We stop at the dog door mat and our teacher smiles at us with welcome through the screen door.

***
I have been obsessing over my "reference photo" the past few days. I want to paint an Arabian princess. I morphed one from different sources. She wears a dress the blue color of deep twilight. She sits with her head turned to the side, as though she is listening for the arrival of her prince.

Our teacher, Miss J, goes around asking each of us what we want to work on this summer. My oldest will not be doing horses which shocks Miss J. (I talked her into stretching this year and doing a portrait type project. I know it's not her passion. I hope she will stretch and grow indeed while still having fun.) My son settles on a desert landscape. My youngest wants to do one of our cat Cricket.

Miss J gives us a plastic grid to lay over our reference photo and tells us to copy it onto our initial paper (we'll transfer the sketch onto better paper next time). It is so tempting to hold the paper up to the photo, but I know that's cheating. Miss J tells me that it might be easier to copy the negative space first. And it is.

Oh, but my princess' beautiful mouth is hard!! I work on it over and over, erasing again and again, and by class' end, it still doesn't look right. Getting the mouth right is so important to me. I want her to look aristocratic, not petulant.

For the next little while, we all work in silence. My outline is starting to look like a woman.The minutes fly. My Arabian princess is coming to life. My heart flutters happily like a butterfly over a garden of flowers.

***
Like my kids, when I was a young girl, I drew all the time. I copied from books, I drew self-portraits. I may have taken an art class once. It was a lot of trial and error.

When I was a young mother, I sometimes got into a painting mood and sequestered the kitchen with my canvas and stand. Sometimes, it grew out of impatience with my fiction. It seemed so much easier to draw what I was trying to write in a few pages.

It feels good to come back to it.

***
If YOU could draw something or someone, what or who would it be?

Summer Bucket List

2011-05-30T06:53:00.005-06:00

Pink Think: " Oh, the summer night, Has a smile of light, And she sits on a sapphire throne." -Barry Cornwall

photo copyright 2011 Jewel Allen

School's out which means...

1. This is the summer to remember, I can just feel it in the air! For one, it's still raining here and cold. Normally it's already in the 80's. Instead of wanting to be outside, I want to burrow in and read a good book. Have you read any page-turners lately? I have a stack from the library but I can't seem to stick to any one of them.

2. Tomorrow, I will start a new adventure with the kids. For the past few years, my kids have been taking art lessons. This year, I decided since all of them will be in it, I might as well join in. I've been tweaking my reference photo on Gimp (cool freeware that is reportedly a lot like Photoshop, though I wouldn't know since I've never used Photoshop before) while my husband laughs in the sidelines. I'm probably overplanning, but I want it to be as close to how I want it to be before I start. I'm nervous and excited.

3. Will also be doing some co-writing of songs for hire. Interesting to take someone else's idea and expand into song. My forte has always been lyrics first and foremost. Without the pressure of coming up with a melody, I'm excited to try my hand at this.

4. My family and I made a summer "bucket list" of things we all want to do this summer. Some things on our list:

-Bear Lake raspberry shakes and beach horseback ride
-Lake Powell
-PBJ crustables
-Take dogs to reservoir
-SCUBA diving
-Try free sailboating
-county and state fairs (mmm, funnel cake!)
-Watch demolition derby (my son would probably say 'drive')
-Go to rodeo
-Watch Pirates 4
-Go to drive in movie
-Sleep in!

What is on YOUR summer bucket list?

Mom School Bus

2011-05-27T09:00:00.010-06:00

Pink Think: "I have the life of Riley. I take my kids to school, do a bit of work in the afternoon, pick my kids up, microwave a meal, hang out with my kids, and work for a couple of hours." - Sheena Easton

photo by Arvind Balaraman

In three hours, I will be picking up my oldest from school for the last time this school year, and the quiet of my mornings as I know it will be gone for the next three summer months.

No more "Mom School Bus".

After the first few weeks of school, it became evident that my two older kids hated going on the school bus. When I probed, they said they didn't like the profanity, the rudeness. So finally, I agreed to take them to, and pick them up from, school.

I didn't love the idea, not at first, the sliver of environmentalist in me objecting to all that pollution on our country road. Back and forth, back and forth, at my kids' beck and call. My days measured by their school bell. And yet I grew to love it.

Every morning, after I'd taken my oldest ones to school, I would check my e-mail while my youngest, who is 11, practiced her piano and flute. I would hear the cats scratching on the french doors of the front room wanting in while she played the flute. If there were a few minutes, my youngest would curl up on the couch and read a book. And then it was time to take her to school.

On the way, we would talk. She told me about her classmates who wanted to put on plays at recess, and how, today, they would be wearing capes and play dress-up. Sometimes, if I was lucky, my two older ones would open up to me, too, about things that frustrated them about the art contest judging, or that life was good and wasn't it awesome that we live in this fabulous world?

***
When I was in high school, my family owned an ancient lumbering lime green Toyota that mortified me to no end. But it was nice to get picked up at the end of the day.

My girlfriends and I would pile in and the driver would drop them off near our house so they could take a jeepney to their house. We called that Toyota our school bus. In that "school bus" we laughed and giggled over our crushes, and we talked like the driver couldn't hear us. But I know he could because every so often, he would roll his eyes.

***
Today, I'm thinking about that again, and how the short commute to school and back forms such an indelible memory in the school experience, when I was a student, and now as a mother. And how glad I could be my kids' "school bus" this year.

Scattering Smiles

2011-05-25T11:35:00.009-06:00

Pink Think: "Let my soul smile through my heart and my heart smile through my eyes, that I may scatter rich smiles in sad hearts." - Paramahansa Yogananda

My husband and I sharing a smiley moment

There is something about weeks and weeks of rain followed by a sunny day (today) that just makes one so expansive and happy. Makes me want to scatter smiles around.

In the spirit of this happiness, I'd like to share some things to smile about:

1. My Dad turns 71 today. Both he and Mom are 71, in fact. My mom's still busy and active, teaching at a community college. My dad has been feeling better than he ever has, since battling cancer in 2008. May they continue going strong!

2. Thank you to the person who invented litter boxes!

3. My op-ed gig has been surprisingly fun and easier than I thought. (Read my guest post on the Women on Writing blog about my decision to be an op-ed columnist.) It's been so liberating, being able to take a stand on something and write about it. I know I need to balance being interesting and coming across as competent. I'm not as scared anymore that I'll offend someone. It's just words, people.

4. Well, I mean, words do matter. Words can be powerful. But as writers when we write down our honest thoughts and feelings, somehow, we are invincible from people who will call our bluff. I mean, what can they do to us when we are being honest while still trying to be respectful? They may call my reasoning flawed, but hopefully they can't accuse me of fraud.

5. It feels good to be freelancing again on a regular basis. It's a good amount of work to complement my other writing and LIFE.

6. I got a new novel idea again today. It's contemporary YA. I'm assigning it to its place - number 3 - after the contemporary novel I am writing now and a YA historical fantasy series. Who knows if it will subvert my good intentions of sticking to one story at a time? Oh, well, if it does, it's not the end of the world. Sometimes it's good to take a break and recharge. Do people really have a hard time coming up with story ideas? Right now I feel like my creativity is on overdrive. It's great! Overwhelming! Exciting!

7. I had written a song a couple of weeks ago and forgot the melody. Then one day, I found it again! It's great to rediscover it. I do want to tweak the verse melody, but I like the essence of the chorus. I love writing and singing my own songs. Until a year ago, it never occurred to me I could.

8. Last week of school! The kids and I have had a great school year.

9. This is where YOU get to put your own smiley post!!!!! What made you smile today?

Melting Point

2011-05-20T09:26:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "Accustom yourself continually to make many acts of love, for they enkindle and melt the soul." - Saint Teresa

photo of my son holding nine week old Cricket

What makes me melt:

Watching my husband and our two youngest kids diligently planting seeds on their respective rows in the garden during a lull in rain storms.

Thinking, I'm lucky to be married to a good, hard-working man.

Kissing my 15 year old's soft cheek and feeling grateful she still lets me.

Seeing a bag of razors and shaving cream in my 13 year old son's bathroom.

Booting up my computer and discovering one of my kids changed the cursor to a peeled banana. At first I think, "I need to tell the kids to stop messing with the computer." Instead, I laugh and let it go.

Reading my oldest's yearbook and sensing their school pride and camaraderie on every page.

Seeing my son cradle one of our cats gently in his arms.

Hearing the cats gambol up to the front door to greet my youngest.

***
What makes YOU melt?

The Important Things In Life

2011-05-16T14:06:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "Behold the child, by Nature's kindly law pleased with a rattle, tickled with a straw." - Alexander Pope

photo: a reminder my youngest left for her dad

This is one of the reasons why I love having an 11-year old.

Explanation: My daughter told him the bathtub was plugged, so my husband said to leave him a reminder. The lizard reference is a mummified lizard she found in the mountains. She wanted him to put it up on a shelf in the garage. So she included the lizard on the note. :-)

On The Airwaves

2011-05-04T11:52:00.012-06:00

Pink Think: "You turned on the radio and heard all kinds of things." - Luc Ferrari

I feel like my creative life is a radio nowadays. I turn the knob and some stations come in loud and clear, some are really muddled, and some I don't even get with all the static.

For a while last month, my "novel" station was coming in loud and clear. It still does, and often, I find myself thinking about the plot while I run (I have taken up running and love it. Fodder for another post.). It is very much alive, and today I wrote some more.

Lately, though, the "songwriting" station is just dominating my airwaves.

It's kind of fun, running this morning and coming upon a tree branch with bright green leaves of spring, and my mind was searching for a lyric, but...

I form my fingers into a cross to ward off a song inspiration. I have a book to finish, dang it! Maybe I will write it into my journal, so I can write this song someday.

Georgie asked me in an earlier blog post if I found writing songs to be easier than writing in general. The nice thing about songs is, I can have a finished piece in about a day, whereas a novel is like a marathon, delayed gratification.

***
Here's my songwriting process:

I start with an emotion or idea for a song. I sit with my guitar and pluck a few chords. (There's something magical about cradling a guitar and just plucking out sounds, it's so intimate and relaxing.) It helps to have a hook so I can work that into the chorus. Then I make a list of phrases that will support that idea. I cringe over the un-subtle lines, but I have to start somewhere. It's gold if I stumble onto a phrase that is more poetic and layered.

Then I start forming a pattern in the song, humming a potential melody. I don't actually come up with the final melody until I try out different chord combinations. Which pretty much involves GCAD in some form or another which I used to be ashamed of, but there is virtue in simplicity I have decided.

Then my sweet patient family gets to listen to it at least three times. First, when I am so stoked about my idea I just have to share even with blanks in the verses, second when I figure out how to fill the holes, and the third, when it's all complete. And usually even then, it's never really complete until I've sung it for a few days in a row, when I smooth out the bumps.

Other than self-expression right now, I have no ambition for my songs. An open mic somewhere down the road, maybe. My dad said I should get a professional to arrange them, and I nod my head and smile, but to be honest, I am not seeking that right now. I'm just glad to share them with whoever would listen.

***
The hard thing is, I'm getting a lot of "songwriting" interference in my "novel" station. And then there's also my "newspaper gig" station, where every couple of weeks, I put on my op-ed hat and think of an issue that I am passionate enough to write about. So that rattles around in my brain, too. It's enough to drive me batty. When they all come together at the same time, I feel like just shutting off my creative brain. Silence, please!!!

I get in that silent spot when I run, sometimes. I just run and run and run, just listening to my breathing going in and out, and the ground underneath as one foot goes in front of the other. Like meditation.

When I'm done running, I feel like I'm ready to listen again.

Heroes With A Heart

2011-05-02T15:09:00.010-06:00

Pink Think: "A hero is somebody who is selfless, who is generous in spirit, who just tries to give back as much as possible and help people. A hero to me is someone who saves people and who really deeply cares." - Debi Mazar

photo Copyright 2011 by Jewel Allen

Interestingly enough, I got inspired to write this song on May 1, 2011, the day Osama Bin Laden was reportedly killed.

That Saturday, I was in the airport waiting for my flight when a group of sailors and their families walked past, one of the sailors holding onto a child in each hand. One sailor kissed a pregnant woman goodbye. There was a round of applause, then the sailors boarded their flight while their families started walking out of the terminal without their sailor. One mother's shoulders were hunched over as though in physical pain. I will never forget that moving experience.

My THANKS goes out to our hard-working troops and their families for all their sacrifice to protect our freedoms.

Lyrics follow the video below.

HEROES WITH A HEART
Lyrics by Jewel Allen
Music by Jewel & Sierra Allen
Copyright 2011

VERSE
Was waiting for my flight today
When this young couple came my way
She had a flower in her hair
He held her hand with greatest care.

He wore a sailor's navy blue
She wore a ring that looked brand new
They kissed goodbye, it made her cry
As he left to catch his flight.

PRE-CHORUS
When I hear the news
Of a war where we might use
All these sailors
It makes me want to say

CHORUS
These are people, going out to war
Not just numbers, but fam'lies torn apart
Someone's father, mother, someone's child
These are heroes, heroes with a heart.

VERSE
A soldier's troop came into view
Hand in hand, their children, too
Their mothers fol'wing close behind
Their spouses walking by their side

The soldiers got some warm applause
Their goodbye's coming to a close
A mother left with her head bowed
She tried so hard to not turn 'round.

REPEAT CHORUS

BRIDGE
All I ask
Is we choose with care
The battles
Our heroes have to bear

REPEAT CHORUS (key change)

How To Write An Op-Ed

2011-04-26T07:38:00.006-06:00

Pink Think: "It is not best that we should all think alike; it is a difference of opinion that makes horse races." - Mark Twain

So far, I have been having a blast writing op-ed pieces for our local paper. Here are some things I've learned:

1. Use that soapbox wisely. It's a privilege to have a public soapbox at my disposal every other week. I hope not to fritter it away on inconsequential things. So far, I have written about what it's like being a minority in a small town, why I think books should have warning labels, and why pet owners should get their animals fixed. Which means I am usually on the look out for grievances I can address. If I can make even a little dent on an issue, if I could make someone nod and understand a different point of view, I would be satisfied.

2. Waffles are good for breakfast, but not in op-ed pieces. I know that's a little obvious. Having written feel-good essays before, it wasn't mandatory for me to be, well, up-front and summed up about what I feel on an issue. My essays were meandering journeys where I discovered my opinion at the end. An op-ed piece needs to come right out with a stand, and then build the argument from there.

3. Honesty is good, abrasiveness isn't. It's one thing for me to rant and rave to my husband on our nightly walks, it's another to share it with the general public. I want to be careful not to op-whine because let's face it, who wants to be cornered by the neighborhood curmudgeon?

4. Be passionately personal. I've thought about writing on certain topics of general interest, but couldn't go far on them because I don't have a personal connection. And if I don't care about the subject too much, it would show. Redistricting is a hot topic in our political circles right now, and for right or wrong, I don't feel a personal stake in it. So I probably won't write about that. Just the honest truth. But now on the other hand I might write about why I think schools (and parents) should expect more of their students. In fact, it's a topic on my radar right now.

5. Safe is easier but not necessarily compelling. I wanted to write about literacy. Already had it drafted and all. But I just didn't feel a spark in my writing. It was like writing about cooked rice. It didn't pass the "if-I-read-it-out-loud-do-I-relive-that-fire-and-brimstone-angst?" If you see that literacy piece, it means I had a busy weekend and couldn't come up with anything else.

6. Write in your own voice, with your own take on things. I don't claim to be the next Charles Krathaummer. If I had to talk about legislation, I might be able to cull a paragraph or two, and that would be about it. I would feel out of my depth talking about politics. However, I can write with authority about raising a family, being a writer, being a minority. I might not write about the situation in Libya, per se, but I could write about why Americans should be careful intervening in a revolution, having lived through Philippine People Power in the late '80s.

7. Write from your gut. It's so much easier for me to hammer out an op-ed in a sitting. No planning out. No beginning-middle-end argument outline. I just write what comes to mind, and it's exhilarating to see my opinion pour out in an electrifying rush. And then I show it to my hubby. And sometimes sleep on it. Revise some. And then ding!, it's done. When I overtweak, I lose its freshness and my voice gets lost in translation.

8. Write and submit, then forget it. As I've written pieces, I worry about public perception (like one time I wondered if what I was going to say would get me ex-communicated from the LDS Church - it didn't). I ask my awesome husband specifically to look out for things like that. But once it's out and submitted, I don't obsess about it. I am already looking to write my next piece. In fact, I like submitting my op-ed on Friday afternoon instead of the Monday 7 a.m. deadline because I want to enjoy the weekend.

9. Be as specific as possible. I could have written, "Stray animals suffer." Instead, I said, "A dead cat lay on the road, its guts splayed and swarming with flies." It is a carry over from writing fiction: show don't tell.

10. Start strong, end strong. Like a fireworks show, you save some of your ammunition for the finale. You want to return to your basic premise and repeat it like you mean it. I'm still working on this, resisting the urge to back-pedal in an effort to make people still like me in the end.

I could keep going, but I think ten is a good number for now. There's a lot I'm still learning, and I thank my lucky stars to have this opportunity.

You Gave It Your Best

2011-04-23T17:10:00.004-06:00

Pink Think: "What matters as you take life's test, is that you gave it your best." - Jewel Allen

Got home one day from a soccer game where the kids' team didn't score and the other team made 7 goals. I was upset about it and after some contentious discussion with my 15 year old daughter, I said I didn't think I could attend games anymore. I just got so caught up in wanting their team to score or win. Did winning not really matter to her? My wise daughter had this to say to me:

"Mom, when you're applying for an office job, they don't ask about a goal you made. They ask, 'Were you a team player?' The winning isn't what matters. It's doing your best and learning even if you don't score. It's different for each person. Some things are hard for others because they have to learn. Not going to games is not the solution. Maybe parents who have to sit there and watch have something to learn too."

Yes, I know, my jaw dropped.

So I told her, "You know, I was feeling kind of bummed this afternoon and thought about telling you when I picked you up, but didn't want to burden you. I went to the library and saw all these books and wondered why mine wasn't there. Tell me: does winning or getting published not really matter?!"

She said, "Life is a journey, it's not just point A to point B and you're done. Maybe you need to learn to be patient. You need to keep the end result in mind. Do you want to write a book that is just entertaining - there's plenty of those - or do you want a book from your heart that others will really connect with? Maybe your writing has taken over and your life's not balanced anymore. Oh, and also - you should pray before you write so that Heavenly Father will help you write what you should."

Afterwards, we hugged and cried, then my daughter said, "You can come to me anytime you want to talk, Mom."

Here's a song I wrote, dedicated to my wonderful sweet daughter, with love and gratitude.

You Gave It Your Best
Copyright 2011 Jewel Allen

Verse:
You're down at least a dozen points, time is ticking by
You try so badly to be brave but you just want to cry
The game is fin'ly over, it's time to go home
Though it's hard, keep smiling, and you won't go wrong.

Verse:
You write a pile of stories, the years are flying by
You wonder is it worth it, should you give it one more try?
The no's keep on coming, it's time to start anew
Though it's hard, keep believing, you have to write true.

Chorus:
Coz it's trying and learning and giving your all
It's climbing and falling while ans'ring the call
Some days won't go your way
Your heart might want to break
What matters as you take life's test
Is that you gave it your best.

Verse:
You're down that final stretch, the signs are going past
You're not the fastest, you just hope you're not last
The race is fin'ly over, it's time to walk home
Though it's hard, keep on trying, you have to go on.

Repeat Chorus

Bridge:
Some things you learn by failing
Some things you gain by losing
This journey's a gift from above
Enjoy your labor of love.

Repeat Chorus

The Hilarious Potato Incident

2011-04-11T00:01:00.003-06:00

Pink Think: "My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it." - Mark Twain

I tried to explain, but I was laughing too hard. The kids looked at me curiously as I sat at the kitchen table doubled over with laughter and wiping tears as I held a small pink book in my shaking hand. Any of you who have read the "potato" incident in Jane Isfeld Still's little gem of a book The Crazy Daze of Motherhood know what I mean. If you haven't read it, you are missing out.

Product Description: A mother's day is filled with all kinds of emergencies, from bumps and bruises to hospital stays. Find the perfect way to recover from your own family's little emergencies with Jane Isfeld Still's latest book on the hilarious daily challenges of a mother in the fray. You're sure to laugh and cry as you celebrate the joys of motherhood.

Click here to visit her website. You can also win a Mother's Daze basket, chocolate, and stationery on her blog!

***
In two dozen stories over 88 pages, Jane writes about her life as a mother to six children and wife to a water-obsessed man, through a wryly astute and hilarious lens.

Take, for instance, this observation: "How is it possible that we live in an age of electronic and mechanical wonders like satellites in space, Google, and the iPhone, yet we still have people who have no workable lock on their bathroom door?"

Or her thoughts on friends visiting her at the hospital: "I do not want to see my perky friends. They feel the need to come all dressed up in their cutest clothes with hair combed and makeup on."

But like I already mentioned, my favorite was the potato incident.

Thank you Jane, you made my day!

***
Readers, what is the craziest thing YOU did ~~to torment your mother~~ as a kid? (That you'll own up to anyway. I know some of you readers are barely out of your childhood, so you may have to dig deep.)

Or, if you'd rather not confess, answer: "How do you like your potato best?"

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book to review, but it did not in any way influence my review.

A New "Op"-portunity

2011-03-28T23:27:00.010-06:00

Pink Think: "If you have an opportunity to use your voice you should use it." - Samuel L. Jackson

photo from readtms.com

When I recently asked and was accepted by our local paper to write features for them, I hadn't counted on an unexpected request: could I write a regular column as well?

After racking my brain for a bit, I submitted a couple of column ideas, but the editor passed on them. Instead, he offered me a biweekly stint as an op-ed columnist.

I'd written personal essays before, like this and this, but an op-ed column - where I would write about timely topics of broad community interest, arguing a point - is foreign territory.

I got real nervous. Could I do this? Could I write intelligently in a bold way without offending too many people? Or, conversely, could I write pieces that people would not be indifferent to?

And then, I thought, why not? Why not share my perspective on national and local news with others?

With the feature stories, I get to write about local personalities, at a pace that will still allow me to write novels and shorter fiction. With the op-ed, it will be a chance for me to grow my wings as a journalist.

I'm excited to take on this opportunity!

Books As Frigates

2011-03-14T12:41:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "There is no Frigate like a book to take us lands away nor any coursers like a page of prancing Poetry." - Emily Dickinson

photo from johnsemper.com

Like a starved person, I have been devouring books lately. I read four books in as many days and wildly different genres this past week, late at night, until wee hours of morn. They were:

The Bourne Identity by Robert Ludlum
Killer Pizza by Greg Taylor (did not finish)
Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater
City of Ships by Mary Hoffman (still reading it)

What I discovered:

1. I love me a good exciting thriller. I used to read Tess Gerritsen a lot until I just felt too much though like I am in the head of a psycho. Too evil. Too depressing. So I had to stop. I felt the same way eventually about Stephen King's novels. But I love the breathless suspense!!

2. Robert Ludlum was brilliant. If he had never lived in any of those countries in his books, he was a convincing liar. If he did live in all of them, I envy is primary research. I must say though, that after the nth killing, the violence made me feel sick.

3. I loved Killer Pizza's premise (a monster-busting company using a pizza joint as a front), but I did not fall in love with the characters enough. And didn't get scared enough by the stalking monsters to care. I did love the book's packaging. Would have been extra fun if it came with scratch n sniff pizza sticker.

4. I cried after I read Shiver. It was lyrical, poetic, suspenseful, romantic and amazing. But as much as I loved this book, I feel like I cannot recommend it to my 15 year old daughter. Call me a prude, but I didn't like how the main protagonist's choice SPOILER ALERT to have premarital sex (kudos to the author for not getting explicit) seemed too easy, like she woke up one day just knowing how to deal with being sexually active. I've thought about prefacing my recommendation of the book to my daughter, but I haven't figured out how to yet, so meanwhile, I'm not recommending it. END SPOILER ALERT. The character I loved to hate: Isabel. She had me laughing like crazy and reciting her exchanges in the book to my befuddled (as in "I don't get why you think this is so funny") and patient husband.

5. I want to go to Spain and soak it up. I want to write historical novels like Mary Hoffman (who sets hers in lush Italy). I want characters who are beautiful but flawed, wearing court clothes and sporting royal titles.

6. I don't know where I'm going from here with my fiction, but ultimately, I want to write books that will make me stay up until three in the morning and shut them with a sigh because they are over.

***
Have YOU read any great books lately?

My Weakness

2011-03-10T09:48:00.007-07:00

Pink Think: "Every man can transform the world from one of monotony and drabness to one of excitement and adventure." - Irving Wallace

photo of Three Musketeers from nyca.com

I admit, I have a weakness for men with long hair, beards, and exploits of derring-do.

(Except for the long hair right now, my husband fits the bill!)

I am talking about swashbuckling protagonists in novels like Three Musketeers ... The Scarlet Pimpernel ... Don Quixote. (I have seen all three in live theater and loved them.)

***
Of late, I have been thinking of writing another historical novel. On an agent's blog, I read she'd like to see a novel set in Tsarist Russia. So, chasing the market shamelessly, I googled "Tsarist Russia". And all I could think of was, I never did get through Tolstoy's War and Peace. I couldn't picture myself wanting to devote months of my life to a novel set in Russia, and the idea died a natural death.

About five years ago, I wrote a novel featuring an 18th century officer in the Spanish king's Royal Guard. The novel was inspired by family genealogical papers claiming my father is descended from an officer who served King Carlos III in late eighteenth century Spain. I don't know if the claim is true, but it had my imagination working overdrive. Why would a Spanish officer end up in this remote island in the Philippines?

So as I brainstormed plots and settings for a new historical novel, I kept coming back to 18th century Spain. I unearthed my manuscript and was surprised to see that it entertained me as much as I had fun writing it. I think there's potential in it. I am hammering it into shape and will see if agents agree.

***
Who is YOUR favorite swashbuckler?

Beauty In You

2011-02-28T07:43:00.013-07:00

Pink Think: "Never lose an opportunity of seeing anything beautiful, for beauty is God's handwriting." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

photo of sunrise by Darrell Spangler

Last night, I was listening to some inspirational music, and told my daughter I wish I could write songs like that. She said, have you ever tried to before? I said, no. Maybe you should, she said. After a little while, I went to my bedroom and took up her challenge.

The song's inspiration: I was driving home one day with a few worries on my mind when I saw - really paid attention to- beautiful snow-capped mountains in the distance. Their beauty just lifted up my spirits and made me feel God's love, like he was sending a message of encouragement. Lyrics follow the video below.

BEAUTY IN YOU
Copyright 2011 Jewel Allen

Restless and searching
Day after day
I seek life's meaning
From things far away

Then I stop to listen
to a bird's sweet song
It's like I'm hearing
a friend's voice so strong

(Chorus)
(Saying) Open up your eyes
To the beauty of your life
You have many things
To be thankful for
You're the only you
Who can live your life so true
Why can't you see
the beauty in you?

I look at others
Who seem to have it all
I would much rather
Trade lives when I fall

Then I stop to take in
A sunrise of gold
It's like I'm feeling
A friend's loving hold

(Repeat Chorus)

(Bridge)
If you could only see yourself
The way God intended
Soon you'll come to realize
You're beautiful...in His eyes
So...

(Repeat Chorus)

Yes, I can see the beauty...in me.

Goodbye 8,000 words

2011-02-25T14:06:00.006-07:00

Pink Think: "I started a second novel seven times and I had to throw them away." - Amy Tan

photo from photl.com

I know. I'm probably setting a record for the most posts in a week in a long time.

I have been working away quite happily on a historical fantasy that was fun at every turn, complete with giant rodents, dragons and mermaids set in the Philippines. Very Princess Bride-ish. (I skimmed through PB recently by the way and was, in turns, charmed and annoyed with the off-tangents. The movie was much better.)

And then it came to a screeching halt.

I couldn't get past this one scene. I had pretty much abandoned my outline and was going from adventure to adventure wondering where in the world was my story going and was it worth chasing it down?

Should I keep going, I wondered? And then came an omen.

I discovered that one of my kids was writing a story with a scene that I had envisioned in my mind - the crux of this new novel - and I couldn't write it without feeling like I would be inadvertently plagiarizing hers.(Some evenings, I write alongside my kids who write their own stories in longhand, and it's a very cozy feeling.)

8,000 words is painful to say goodbye to. Who knows, maybe I'll resurrect them someday, but I really doubt it.

Five Years From Now

2011-02-24T13:03:00.005-07:00

Pink Think: "Dream and give yourself permission to envision a You that you choose to be." - Joy Page

image from janae davis

Yesterday, I indulged a friend and agreed to be her guinea pig for a sales pitch she needs to make for her business. She asked me things like:

1. If you could have your dream job, what would it be?
2. What do you wish you could change in your present situation?
3. How do you see yourself five years from now?

It was an eye-opener. Usually I'm the one probing for answers, and there I was having to reveal my heart's desire.

Ya know what I really want to do someday: To sell perfume or jewelry or makeup from behind a counter at a ritzy department store. Or cars (in a better economy). I would just love to make people happy by selling them the solution to their needs. Or be a Zumba instructor - I love latin music, I love to dance, and I would love to get paid enjoying both.

Oh, and yes, of course! Published novelist would be fun, too! That's how I see myself five years from now. To have a published novel...while teaching Zumba between book tours.

La di da!

***
How about YOU? How do YOU see yourself five years from now?

Restless

2011-02-22T12:51:00.004-07:00

Pink Think: "Anxiety is part of creativity, the need to get something out, the need to be rid of something or to get in touch with something within." - David Duchovny

photo by Royce Bair

This is how I've been
since I let my new story go
out in the world
to find itself a home:

Restless...like
a child waiting
a horse pacing
a crowd standing
a mother expecting.

My mind spins to try
and find a new love
which I can adore
on the blank page:

Stories...like
a girl glowing
a boy sleuthing
a princess fighting
a woman searching.

When The Shots Aren't Falling

2011-02-16T11:24:00.007-07:00

Pink Think: "I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” - Michael Jordan

photo by sitin duk

I play weekly basketball with some ladies from our church and it's been a lot of fun, but very humbling.

Today we played two-on-two. My second pairing was with a recent high school graduate who played hs ball. She could take on an entire team if she had to, she's that good. But today, she kept feeding me passes...and my shots just wouldn't fall in.

I told her she should just make the shots next time, but she said, "I need to work on passing the ball." I thought it was cool that someone as good as her still felt like she could improve.

Well, I went home and considered feeling sorry for myself. And then a memory from Monday afternoon came back to me.

***
We had gone as a family to the church to play basketball (our family plays a lot of basketball, in case you haven't noticed). My son, who is 13 and is almost as tall as his dad and has the arm span of a bomber plane, tried open shots, but his shots weren't falling. Later in the pick-up game, his shots did finally start falling. For all his later success, he was bummed about the missed shots.

My advice to him: "When the shots aren't falling, focus on the good things that are going well. Feel good in the fact that you are trying and creating scoring opportunities. Sometimes you will have good days, and sometimes not-so-good. The important thing to do is to keep trying."

***
You ever have one of those days when you think nothing is going your way...that the shots aren't falling?

Here are a few things I have learned to tell myself:

1. Look ahead. Stop thinking of what you missed and instead find other opportunities. Maybe drives aren't your forte, so focus on your strengths. And if you do want to be good at drives, learn from others and practice.

2. Have fun. Loosen up. Laugh at yourself and you will see that life isn't really that bad.

3. Stop comparing yourself to others. Sometimes I'm tempted to just hide in a corner and never set foot on a basketball court. My girlfriends outplay me in all sorts of basketball maneuvers. But you know what? I couldn't make free throw shots a year ago. Now I'm actually starting to make them. And guarding tougher. And not double-dribbling as much.

4. Never give up!

One of these days my shots will start falling...in basketball...in getting an agent...in getting published...in simply living this blessed God-given life to the fullest. I just know it. And when that happens, you'll get an earful of whoopin' from this gal.

Morning Balm

2011-02-14T07:33:00.008-07:00

Pink Think: When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love." - Marcus Aurelius

Photo by me: my daughter after an early morning hike last summer

It's amazing how sleep could be such a balm.

I thought about reading a book to help relax me before bed last night, but after a few pages, when the book didn't hold my interest, I gave up. I then went to bed at midnight fraught with worry over a few things.

But then morning came, and the world was pretty again. I put it all in His hands now.

***
I'm thankful my writing is going well. Some updates:

1. I've started querying freelance articles again.

2. A couple of people are reading my BLEMISH manuscript. I am itching to start querying, but I will make myself sit on my hands and wait for feedback so when my "baby" does go out to agents, it'll be all polished and nice, and I'd know I gave it my best shot.

3. I have started a historical fantasy set in, where else, the Philippines in the latter part of the 18th century, which is my favorite time period of all. It's set in this world with some minor characters who are also actual people from history, but there are fantasy elements. I'm having a ball introducing all sorts of mayhem and imaginary creatures.

***
What are YOU thankful for this morning/day?

Bumpy Landings and Chocolate

2011-02-08T00:01:00.003-07:00

Pink Think: "Flying might not be all plain sailing, but the fun of it is worth the price." - Amelia Earhart

Today, I have the pleasure of being part of my friend Donald Carey's blog tour for his debut novel BUMPY LANDINGS.

Be sure to scroll to the end of this post and answer the question by Saturday, February 12, to be entered into this week's BUMPY LANDINGS Book Tour Contest.

What you can win: CHOCOLATE! Also, your entry will be included in a Grand Prize drawing for more CHOCOLATE, a copy of BUMPY LANDINGS, and a CD of Vaihi. How cool is that?

***
From the back cover: When Jordan MacDonald goes behind his mother's back to get his pilot's license, he soon finds out that a life full of dishonesty attracts more turbulence than he's ever faced in the air. Set against the majestic backdrop of the Hawaiian islands, this heartwarming story of romance and self-discovery will take you to new heights with each turn of the page.

My two-cents: Whenever I read a book, I always read it in context of my own personal experiences. As I am originally from the Philippines, I loved all the tropical references, whether it was the flowers (the protagonist works for a flower shop) or the food. I also have flown before in a four-seater plane, and to be honest, I was too air-sick to appreciate it, but I can see its allure for Jordan. Lastly, I love romance novels, and it was fun to read one from the point of view of a guy.

[I kept thinking, as I read, where are the recipes? Fortunately, the author has pani popo and chocolate haupia pie recipes on his blog.]

***
To be entered into the BUMPY LANDINGS Book Tour Contest (did I mention you can win CHOCOLATE?), answer this question by Saturday, February 12:

If you could fly anywhere in the world, where would you want to go?

Author's Note

2011-01-28T02:06:00.015-07:00

Pink Think: "People really want to think that these things really happened. I don't know why that's important, but I know that when I finish reading a novel or something, I want to know how much of that really happened to this author." - Alison Bechdel

I finished the revision of my historical novel Blemish at 2 a.m. this morning. 75,936 words, 271 pages in double-spaced 11 point Times Roman.

I am absolutely happy in a wiped out sort of way.

When I finished it, I moved the laptop I've been revising with the last few weeks from our kitchen counter, back to my writing corner in my bedroom. For the next few days at least, my kids won't have to ask me to move my laptop so they wouldn't splash it washing dishes.

Up next: a guilt-free nap. Maybe a Paris sable from the new local pastry shop.

What might actually happen: grocery-shopping. Because I can no longer improvise with "what's in the pantry".

***
I don't know about you, but after reading a novel, especially a historical novel, I am always excited to find an "Author's Note". I love seeing what inspired the author to write the novel and to see how much of the novel was based on actual historical events.

Blemish is a historical novel set in the Philippines about a 17-year-old socialite whose life is turned upside down when she is diagnosed with leprosy and banished to a leper colony.

This is my Author's Note:

The setting of BLEMISH - Kolong - is a fictional island I based on Culion, a former leper colony in the Philippines from the early 1900s to the 1950s.

Just after the turn of the century, the Philippine government decided to stem the growing number of leprosy cases in the country through forcible quarantine. To this end, they asked residents of the sparsely populated island of Culion - including the Sandovals (a branch of my paternal grandmother’s family)- to move out, so they could establish a colony there. Today, this island in the southern region of Palawan is a world renowned research and treatment facility for leprosy, or Hansen’s disease, and is striving to move away from the stigma of its past.

Due to the family connection, I put Culion on my list of places to visit and finally had the opportunity to do so in 2007. The museum was closed that day, but Dr. Arturo Cunanan, head of Culion Leprosy Control, graciously opened up the building. My group and I wandered its halls and slipped back into time.

One of the displays moved me deeply – that of a nursery with a glass window. Through that window, mothers could glimpse their children playing or sleeping, but never hold them in the hopes the disease will bypass their children. Somehow, that image clung to me and never let go, planting the seed for this novel.

Although this novel is a work of fiction, some of its details are based on actual historical events. For example, in the early years of the leper colony, marriage was banned among patients, and a group of young men rebelled, taking their sweethearts into the mountains. Also, a fishing cooperative became successful, necessitating the production of ice and making Culion one of the first islands in the region to generate its own source of electricity.

Kolong exists largely in my imagination, but the juxtaposition of emotions – of despair and hope, of suffering and triumph, of need and compassion, of isolation and love – was real.

***
I usually dread revisions because I get muddled real quick and then I just have a mess in my hands. But this time, I enjoyed deepening the characters, adding foreshadowing, fleshing out scenes, showing not just telling. My initial 65,000 word draft grew and the end became a running joke between my husband and me, because one day I would be 20 pages away from being done, and the next, 30, back and forth. But finally, FINALLY, I got to THE END. Next up: it'll make its rounds with my awesome beta readers.

See you at the pastry shop! And then the grocery store...

Thinking Big

2011-01-23T08:24:00.004-07:00

Pink Think: "I like thinking big. If you're going to be thinking anything, you might as well think big." - Donald Trump

My 13 year old son came home one day all excited about an old ice cream truck he saw in a neighbor's yard. He said he wanted to restore it and drive it around in high school. After all, he'd have a few years to fix it up in time for high school. One of his friends even said, that'd be cool; he'd help!

So, like the good mom that I am, I said we'd take a look at it. I took him on a chilly afternoon to the neighbor's place. We detoured through the back to take an up-close look at this coveted vehicle.

What I saw, as I shivered outside that cloudy day: flat tires, rusty exterior, no-roof cab with gutted out parts and cushions that looked like mice had nested in them, a freezer at the back with doors off hinges. A fixer upper and then some. I blinked a few times, unbelieving. It certainly looked a heck of a lot better from a hundred yards away.

What I said: "Wow."

"I know," he said. "Isn't it cool?"

We visited with the neighbor for a few minutes and she said it had been with the family for 40 years. Her husband and sons bought it as a project that many years ago, but had never gotten around to it. With her husband long gone, she said she would be open to a reasonable offer.

We thanked her for her time and told her we'd think about it.

"How could I earn enough money to buy it?" my son asked me in the car on our way home.

"You'd have to really look into how much money and work it will take," I reminded him.

He scoffed. "Of course."

"You know," I said, "if you want to restore an old car, Grandpa has one sitting in his driveway..."

"Yeah, but I want an ice cream truck."

My husband has yet to look at it with him, and who knows if my son could even swing the money, but I love that he thinks big. And if I can indulge him in this dream, why not?

Back On Track

2011-01-10T22:16:00.009-07:00

Pink Think: " If the track is tough and the hill is rough, THINKING you can just ain't enough!" - Shel Silverstein

photo from fotosearch

This weekend, I almost got derailed.

I had been slugging away at the revision of my historical novel, typing away merrily, when the steam kind of ran out. Novel fatigue, if you will. I just couldn't stand the thought of spending another minute trying to tie the loose ends of my story.

I gave in to the voices and shelved my story for a day, while I flirted with a middle grade story which intrigued my ten-year-old to no end because it had something to do with cats. I almost went with this instead.

The weekend came and went. I gritted my teeth and went back to my historical novel and forced myself to get past that little hiccup.

I introduced monkeys. And made my protagonist spunkier. No more Miss Nice Girl.

I got through and I think I am back on track. I am 70k words into this second draft and gaining steam again. I am nearly to the part where I can transition into the already-written part of my story.

Which is a major relief let me tell you.

Because when you have 70k words already written it'd be pretty sad to get derailed and never get back on track. Coz you wouldn't know what could have been then, could you?

Then maybe someday I'll get back to the cats. But until then...

Making Good Better

2010-12-31T08:08:00.011-07:00

Pink Think: "Good, better, best. Never let it rest. Until your good is better and your better is best." - NBA pro Tim Duncan

photo from kelseykerridge

I sat in the bleachers yesterday watching my 15 year old daughter play (mostly) point guard on her high school basketball team. This is the daughter who, just last April, had to have surgery to replace her ACL. She plays as tough as the rest of 'em with a knee brace.

She is a talented freshman who has been playing more Junior Varsity and Varsity minutes as the season has progressed. Some days are better than others, but unfailingly, she says, "I think I'm doing better with each game."

To her, love of game (which she has plenty of) is not enough; she is constantly trying to improve. She asks feedback from her dad on things she could do better. She works hard to improve her craft. Freshman practice is not mandatory for her, but she says she wants to go so long as she has no homework that day.

She inspires me to do better.

***
Though I can say I am no longer the wide-eyed freshman writer I was when I first completed a novel in 2006 and attended my first writer's conference in 2007, I know I still have a lot to learn.

With the completion of my fourth novel in October, I am getting more efficient writing my first draft to reflect most of the story I had in mind.

I am getting more than just form rejection letters from agents, which means I am getting better at writing queries.

From that first book-length project (a memoir that will probably not see the light of day but had to be written before I could feel free to write other things), I think I am improving with each novel I write.

In the coming year, I resolve to get better at revising. To be braver and take more risks. To write more from the heart and to be more "real". As my blogger friend and fellow writer Vivi says, "See...we have to write from the heart...otherwise what's the point in putting ourselves through this torture!"

***
Here's to all of us as we take stock of how far we have come and resolve to do even better in 2011. May you and your family be blessed with happiness and prosperity in the coming year!

What do YOU resolve to do better in 2011?

Strength?

2010-12-22T08:14:00.005-07:00

Pink Think: "Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies." - Mother Teresa

photo from coyote-trader

I tried. I really tried.

Every year, I enter a Christmas writing contest in our local paper. I wanted to do so again this year. Hours before the deadline, I was still racking my brain for a warm and fuzzy, Hallmark-type story to submit.

As it has often happened in the past, I did come up with a story...a horror story set around Christmas, called Coyote Christmas.

Honestly, Jewel, I told myself. Can't you just write a sweet story?

Is it in me to write a sweet story? What does it say about me when I write stories that scare or shock people out of their socks?

I couldn't submit it. I let the deadline pass. The story is still in my computer.

***
My husband asked me the other day, "Why don't you focus on writing short stories? You seem really good at them."

I've been thinking about his comment since, as I try to decide what direction my writing will take from here on.I would love, for instance, to write short stories that collectively read like a novel.

After reading Anchee Min's novel Pearl of China, I feel inspired to revise my latest historical novel. That's the way I am leaning right now.

Trying to not rush my decision, as I am in Christmas mode these next couple of weeks. The waiting has been delicious. It's like waiting to open a present.

***
Last week, I finally got an answer from the assistant to the big-name agent who's had my Ghost Moon Night manuscript since September. And the answer was no.

Sigh.

The note was encouraging and generous with the feedback. He said he was "totally creeped out" by my "vividly imagined" monsters.

I keep thinking my penchant for writing scary stories is less than honorable. But maybe, just maybe, I should be capitalizing on this.

Transitions

2010-12-13T10:44:00.008-07:00

Pink Think: "And so I'm still giving some thought - I will transition hopefully into the corporate world. And I look forward to getting involved in several other areas that I have a great interest in." - Hugh Shelton

photo by Sandra Silva on Trek Earth

One of the most challenging parts of writing a novel for me are the transitions, where I move from one scene to another.

Right now, in my own life, I am having to contemplate transitions myself.

I took a bit of a break after finishing my historical novel Blemish, which is a novel set in turn-of-the-20th-century Philippines. It is the story of a 17 year old debutante whose life is turned upside down when she is diagnosed with leprosy.

This past week, I simply refilled my well: I rode horses with the family, wrote out my Christmas cards, caught up with volunteer and paid work, and read books voraciously.

Where do I go to from here? I could, for instance,

1.revise Blemish
2.start a brand new story
3.extensively revise another historical novel, Girl From Gurian
4.take up a job as a circus trainer

The last item is part tongue in cheek, part not. My kids are old enough I can work outside the home for part of the time, but the job needs to be flexible enough so when my husband is off, I can be off, too. I've toyed with the idea of temping which will give me income, flexibility and variety. I want to explore options other than freelance writing. "Published Novelist" would be fine and dandy, but until then...

I'll be 40 in August. I am yearning to reinvent myself, to shake out of these doldrums. Is this what they call midlife crisis?

Two Sweetest Words

2010-12-05T07:27:00.008-07:00

Pink Think: "I think everyone who makes movies should be forced to do television. Because you have to finish. You have to get it done, and there are a lot of decisions made just for the sake of making decisions. You do something because it's efficient and because it gets the story told and it connects to the audience." - Joss Whedon of Buffy the Vampire Slayer fame

Art from idsgn

As of midnight of Saturday, Dec. 4, I typed the two sweetest words in a novel manuscript: The End. Folks, the first draft of my YA historical novel Blemish is done at 65, 425 words.

I almost just went to bed, but I decided to push myself a little bit longer. I did it!

***
I had not intended to finish it at all. This summer, my interest in the story petered out mainly because I was too busy. And then NaNoWriMo rolled around, and I decided to put in enough words to make 50k. Then I wanted to put in enough words to just finish the darn thing.

Like dough I will let this ms rest. I will do my Christmas cards, clean the house, dust off some other work.

I feel good about this story. It's not perfect by any means, and I will have to reconcile details to historical accuracy, but it has potential.

***
I didn't think I had in me to finish another novel. It's probably been two years since I last completed one. But here are some things that helped:

1. I bought a used laptop without wireless internet. Which meant I wasn't as good about blogging. But I was better at writing my novel.

2. I joined NaNoWriMo. I got into the daily habit (except Sundays) of writing. I chipped away at 50k and soon it was just a matter of finishing it.

3. I wrote the story knowing a possible ending, but didn't know the twists and turns until I got there. The characters and plot surprised me. I let the characters show me the story. Which was fun!

4. My hubby was sure glad when NaNo was over, but he did a lot of chores around the house so I could write and the neighbors didn't have to call Social Services on us. Thank you dear!! And my kids encouraged me. They've seen me in this mode a few other times, and they cheered me on.

5. Heavenly Father blessed me with another story to create. For that, I am grateful.

6. My writer's group, Unpenned, as well as blog and Facebook friends cheered me on to continue.Thank you!

My brain is still a little in a haze, but a good haze! I'll be back soon to give updates, meanwhile, may you have a wonderful Christmas season!

NaNo Was No Turkey

2010-11-18T13:12:00.007-07:00

Pink Think: "I am thankful...to God for each story, each idea, each word, each day." - Isaac Bashevis Singer

original art from Rocky Point PARP

Midway through NaNoWriMo and feeling good. Though not in the way I expected.

I signed up for National Novel Writing Month with a 50k word goal by month's end. Or more like - I didn't take my name off the website so I was unofficially in the running. Started with a fun story which fizzled about 5,000 words in.

But all was not lost!

Thanks to the writing habit that got me motivated again, I picked up a Work In Progress that I abandoned over the summer and am writing again. Every day except for Sunday. I look forward to it. Most days I cannot wait to get back to it. I am in love with the main characters and I just sit there letting them tell me the story. I kind of know where the story is heading, but I am as surprised myself with the twists and turns.

One thing different about this project (historical women's fiction)is I have been writing from different points of view, and it's so interesting. Sometimes I think "but is that realistic to the time period?" and I beat back that inner editor and just keep writing. There will be time to fix things later.

I am not as concerned about word count, though for the record, I am nearly 30k into this manuscript. My goal is 80k just so it's more commercially viable, but I plan to just keep writing the story, and then fill in the gaps if it ends up short of my goal.

As long as I have a forward momentum, I am happy. And not only that, I am actually getting sleep! Well, most days I get reasonable amount of sleep. I used to push myself by writing until I was cross-eyed and the morning after was ugly in terms of my manuscript and in terms of my disposition.

My recent guilty pleasure has been to turn on the radio in my bedroom when everyone is gone and play Christmas music (my husband has this thing about not doing Christmas until day after Thanksgiving). So I do have to turn it off when I am writing scenes set in February in the Philippines.

I feel like I am walking around in a good fog...making my list for Thanksgiving dinner which I am hosting while thinking of how to get my protagonist in and out of trouble.

***
Happy Thanksgiving to you all!! I am grateful for each and everyone of you bloggy friends!

Life is Good

2010-11-09T07:51:00.005-07:00

Pink Think: "There is no shortage of good days. It is good lives that are hard to come by." - Annie Dillard

photo of Emmie the beagle by Cricket and Junebug the kittens...no fur flying

Heigh Ho!

My big fundraising event is over. Not perfect and learned lots, but a grand success nonetheless. All receipts aren't in yet, but probably made close to $5k. The speaker showed up, the dinner was great, the volunteers helped, the event ran pretty much as planned.

I learned that -

People are generous.
Inexpensive can still be classy.

What's next -

Racking up more words for NaNoWriMo
Getting more sleep
Taking a break
Playing more guitar

Update: my kittens and dogs are getting along.

Life is good!

***
Went into a McDonalds yesterday to buy breakfast for my daughter, her friend and me. We were running late, so I hurried through my order. The woman who helped us didn't smile the whole time. It was only 8 and she acted like it was the end of her shift. So I paused, giggled and said, "How are you?" and she looked at me suspiciously. I smiled anyway. I decided her bad mood wouldn't get me down. And it didn't. I can be one of those annoyingly cheerful people, when the mood strikes.

Life is good, folks! Really. Have you shared your smile today?

Haunted Tomato

2010-10-29T11:09:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "A world without tomatoes is like a string quartet without violins." - Laurie Colwin, Home Cooking

Me, as a tomato

Last night while dressed as a tomato (I love being able to write that!), I got to read my poem called, ahem, The Midnight Stock Boy and the Haunted Produce. It placed second in a local Halloween poetry contest's "community" category. It was so fun to write, and even funner to read to an audience.

My oldest daughter told my husband she hoped none of her friends would be in the audience. None of them were. And thankfully, she didn't seem overly embarassed. :-)

When I have the chance, I will post my tomato pic and maybe even the poem. If I knew how to illustrate or do clay-mation, I'd love to make a Youtube video. I think any vegetable-actors are now done for the growing season so a live performance is probably out of the question.

A Phantom of an Idea

2010-10-26T08:29:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "Let your mind start a journey to a strange new world! Leave all thoughts of the life you knew before! Let your soul take you where you long to be!" -Erik, The Phantom in The Phantom of the Opera

photo of The Phantom and Christine from Ace Photos

I've had this Phantom of a story idea and I'm getting ready to tackle it. Yes, folks, I'm doing NaNoWriMo again this year. It's a 50,000 word novel challenge in 30 days (the month of November).

Yup. I've thrown my hat in the ring and I'm excited! I haven't been this excited about participating since I last won it in 2007. For those of you doing it, I am "Pink Ink" and would love to be your Buddy.

I have an idea of my story, and need to work on an outline between 2 kittens (who are integrating well into the household, I am happy to report), a daughter in high school that wants to try out for basketball and doesn't drive yet, my Nov. 4 fundraising event, and all the November get-togethers everyone is trying to squeeze in before Christmas.

I used to drag my feet about joing NaNo, but this year, I can't wait to flesh out my story idea. I've not been writing consistently lately and I crave a creative challenge.

***
Which brings me to the Phantom of the Opera.

Having recently discovered the 2004 movie starring Gerard Butler and Emmy Rossum, thanks to my oldest daughter, I have decided I want to write a story with characters that seize you right from the first page and don't let go. Like the Phantom.

No pressure.

***
Are YOU doing NaNoWriMo? Do you know what you'll be writing about?

Meow-velous News

2010-10-21T08:31:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "What feeling is so nice as a child's hand in yours? So small, so soft and warm, like a kitten huddling in the shelter of your clasp." - Marjorie Holmes

For the longest time, I resisted my youngest's pleas to have her own cat. Over the years, we have borrowed a neighbor's and, just recently, almost stole another's.

Now, we are the proud owners of not just one, but two cute, rambunctious kittens named Cricket and Junebug.

***
A couple of weeks ago, my youngest came home saying she had found two stray cats in the undeveloped portion of our subdivision. I didn't think anything of it; she is a stray-cat magnet.

Soon, she was making trips to the field with her brother almost every afternoon. One day, it all came to a head. I got home to her and her brother preparing their afternoon visit. He was holding a water bottle. We were already late for something and I was frazzled. I told them to hurry. As they sped off on their bikes, my heart softened. I saw these two sweet kids trying so hard to take care of kittens in their own way, and even my son had been recruited for this noble purpose.

Finally, I told my hubby we had better adopt the cats. He said I could have the honor of breaking the news.

***
They were teenage kittens, still small but already starting to form their lanky bodies. My kids had put out a little bowl for their water and some cat treats. As my youngest carried one in her arms, I told her, "Guess what? We can adopt them."

"Really?" she squealed. Boy, did I feel like a hero.

But the story doesn't end there. That evening, when we went to the field to take them home so my husband could fix them the next day (he is a veterinarian), they weren't in the field. Minutes later, my oldest came running saying we should check with a neighbor; a black cat was sitting on their rock.

Turns out we almost catnapped a neighbor's cats.

My youngest didn't cry, though she looked understandably upset. A memory came back to me: someone was telling me just the other day her cat had kittens and did we want one?

***
We picked out not just one, but two kittens. They pounce-play all day and purr when I pick them up. They chase each other's tails and hide from each other behind the laundry hamper. Right now they are sequestered in our laundry room, with a child's gate between them and the dogs until they get used to each other.

Some days I sigh and wonder what I took on. But when I see the happiness on my kids' faces as they hold the kittens in their arms, and when the kittens' antics make me smile, I know it's worth it.

Calling

2010-10-07T07:15:00.004-06:00

Pink Think: "I don't know what my calling is, but I want to be here for a bigger reason. I strive to be like the greatest people who have ever lived." - Will Smith

photo from Wordpress Themes

It's been a good kind of crazy around here.

I'm the president of our local alumni association and I have been organizing a scholarship fundraising event slated for Nov. 4. Our board is barebones but stellar, sponsors are signing on, we have a fabulous speaker, and things are looking up. I can't wait to see this all to fruition.

I feel like I am in my element. Like this is my calling, if you will. I have enjoyed seeing this project go from mere idea to event, all the pieces interlocking like a jigsaw puzzle. And not spending a whole lot of money.

***
Some people hate asking people for money. I love it. It's all in the spin.

I could ask people for a donation, or I could invite them to promote their business through a donation.

I could ask them to sponsor a table or I could ask them to get a great value for their training dollars while supporting a good cause.

Spin sounds so fakey, but it really comes down to perspective.

I told my husband with all the time and effort I'm expending, I could be working a paying job. Who knows, maybe this will open up opportunities for me. After Nov. 4, we'll see.

***
One downside of organizing this event, I feel glued 24/7 to my e-mail. Thank goodness I don't have a Blackberry.

In order for me to be productive with my other writing, I bought myself a used, no-frills laptop for a hundred bucks. I use it just mostly for Word documents and it has no wireless internet. It gives me a webby break.

That's where I'll be for now.

When I'm not inviting someone to promote their business, that is.

Critters

2010-09-30T07:30:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "A horse is the projection of peoples' dreams about themselves - strong, powerful, beautiful - and it has the capability of giving us escape from our mundane existence." -Pam Brown

photo: Emmie (top) and Lovey

Our place is overrun with critters.

First, my little beagle Emmie got sick (she's better now).

And then yesterday I rode a 10 year old Arabian mare named Lovey to check her out for our ten year old daughter. My husband will be bringing her home today. She joins our herd as the fifth horse.

My daughter woke up this morning saying she had a dream that "we had too many horses in our pen."

"Guess what," I said, laughing. "We do."

***
Four years ago, I'd never thought I'd be going down to a stranger's place to check out a horse by myself, to tack it up and ride it. I met the guy at this huge, beautiful log house with a red barn behind and horses grazing in a pasture right smack in the middle of city.

He had been gruff on the phone with me, an old-school cowboy. I wanted to take my time deciding about the horse, "We can go later in the week" but he said he was going to be out of town for three weeks starting then. "That's too bad it didn't work out," he intoned.

My oldest said, "Don't get pressured into buying a horse."

Darn right! So I meekly put aside everything else and went down yesterday right after I dropped my youngest off to school.

Lovey's owner was 26 and got killed in a car accident this past weekend. Her funeral was yesterday. The family wanted to find another home for Lovey immediately. The guy who showed me Lovey was the neighbor, trying to help the family. A mutual friend thought of us. We have been thinking of getting a different horse for our youngest since her horse, Wixie, is starting to slow down.

***
I'm used to quarter horses. They are stocky built, calm creatures. Arabians on the other hand have a well-deserved reputation for being hot and flighty. Lovey got excited for a little bit, then calmed down.

She was small and easy to lead around. Her skin was soft like pelt and her eyes were kind. I couldn't get her to lope. Not yet. My oldest who is the most horse savvy of us said it might be a respect issue.

I hope so. I hope she will turn out to be a good horse.

Because when my youngest meets Lovey today, she will probably fall in love with her like I did. Don't you just hate it when critters grow on you?

Wild Flower Rhapsody

2010-09-20T07:46:00.005-06:00

Pink Think: "You're only here for a short visit. Don't hurry, don't worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along the way." - Walter Hagen

photo by me

I was driving down the freeway worried about a few things, intent on getting home.

Then I saw the lady beside a parked car. She had a bright pink shirt and was cutting an armful of sunflowers that grew wild along the side of the road.

And I saw all of a sudden that the roadside had hundreds of beautiful yellow sunflowers dancing in the breeze, against a backdrop of gray dessert soil.

I had been too preoccupied to notice.

Thank you, Sunflower Lady, for the reminder.

***
My flowers-

freckles on my youngest's face, and kissing them!
August temperatures in September
waking up to the sound of a child practicing the piano
a bite of strawberry danish twist
the promise of a nap on a quiet Sunday afternoon
coming home to the smell of crockpot roast
my oldest helping her brother at a horse show
joy on my son's face for his best effort

***
What are YOUR flowers?

Hope

2010-09-14T11:52:00.009-06:00

Pink Think: "Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul - and sings the tunes without the words - and never stops at all." - Emily Dickinson
My dream cover of Ghost Moon Night. Photo of water buffalo and boy is by amel murillo on flickr.

I am requerying my young adult fantasy novel Ghost Moon Night thanks to a recent personalized comment by an agent. She said my concept was interesting especially the part about the water buffalo who snorts when happy.

She passed on it, but thanks to her, she made me think of what my novel is all about. That I really should capitalize on its tropical quirkiness. So I changed the first chapter, drawing from a later scene in the book, and requeried some agents. A few hours after I sent a batch, I got an email from a big-name agent requesting the full manuscript.

*jaw drop*

The difference: a query letter revised numerous times and a first chapter that I think better captures the voice of my 17 year old main character. I edited like crazy Saturday and emailed it out Monday.

***
How I described Ghost Moon Night:

One night a month, the residents of a Philippine town have to shut all their windows and doors to ward off langbuan, winged undead, brought on by the ghost moon night curse. Seventeen-year old Antonio volunteers to break this curse, even though he is possibly the worst person to help his town. After all, he steals and lies, and he’s not above cheating his employer to get his coveted record player. However, this is his chance for redemption, and a cash prize sure doesn’t hurt. So he enlists the help of his best friend who plays coconut basketball, a tomboyish girl who dislikes him, and a water buffalo named Cupid who grunts when happy.

But it’s not easy. He has to decide if it’s worth fighting the town’s revered elder who wants to keep the status quo even as the langbuan grow in numbers and get more audacious. Will Antonio’s quick wits – and his sidekicks – be enough to break the curse, before the curse breaks him and his entire town?

Ghost Moon Night is a completed 66,000-word young adult fantasy novel that takes place in 1950s Philippines. It will appeal to fans of books like Greg Taylor’s Killer Pizza and James Dashner’s Maze Runner.

***
Now I wait.

The Blessing of Waiting

2010-09-10T08:49:00.006-06:00

Pink Think: "But if we learn to think of it as anticipation, as learning, as growing, if we think of the time we spend waiting for the big things of life as an opportunity instead of a passing of time, what wonderful horizons open out!" - Anna Neagle

photo from mylalaland

It seems I am always waiting.

Waiting to hear back from someone. Waiting for a child at a music lesson. Waiting to see a teacher at school. Waiting at the fast food line. Waiting to turn left at the traffic signal. Waiting to hear back from an agent. Waiting for my hair to set at the stylist's.

In this age of instant everything, waiting seems outdated. Inappropriate. The subject of a tirade or an angry letter-to-the-editor.

To me, it can be a blessing.

***
I am sitting in a high school office waiting to see the assistant principal. I watch a few kids come in and out, in various stages of confidence. Looking physically grown, yet so vulnerable in the way they touch their hair, their tentative walk. I bet their moms make them drink their milk still everyday. And they probably say no, but I hope they are secretly glad someone cares.

A mom comes in with a little boy and a huge balloon bouquet. One balloon in particular draws my attention: it says in bright bold colors, "18". The mom asks the attendant if she could leave it for her daughter. "It's a surprise," she says.

There is something about the mom standing there with her big balloon bouquet that makes my eyes well with tears. It makes me think of my 14 year old, and how she would be 18 someday, too. She was little not too long ago.

"Big day," I say, pointing to the balloon.

The mom turns and smiles. "Yes. I've been balling all morning."

"I feel like crying just watching you," I admit, wiping away a tear as I chuckle.

"I don't know how we survived it," she says. "When she was a baby, she cried all the time and wouldn't sleep. But now."

Yes. I nod. But now. "Children are amazing," I say.

She waves at me as she leaves, the balloons a rainbow tree over the fax machine.

I wish I could wait a little more to see how her daughter would react to the bouquet, but the assistant principal comes out of his office. My wait is over.

***
Waiting, to me, is pausing long enough in the marathon that is life and paying attention to its exquisite details. It's catching my breath between the rushing and the hurrying. When I just let myself be, I can discover amazing things.

I love waiting. Do you?

Like a Kid

2010-09-02T07:38:00.012-06:00

Pink Think: "The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic." - Bill Cosby
photo from pbase.com

I was sitting in the truck waiting for my youngest finish her flute lesson when an interesting scene unfolded at the yard across the street.

The little girl looked about five, her brother three. There was a little wading pool on their small but tidy front lawn. A hose spewed water mostly on the driveway and on this little dirt patch between the driveway and lawn. Their mom came out and told them to turn the water off. "And don't you dare come in with muddy feet," she added for good measure.

The mom went inside and the two kids gravitated towards the little mud puddle that had by now formed in the dirt patch. The girl brought out a spade from the garage. The boy began digging. Soon, the spade was ditched to the side for his hands.

Like a well-plotted short story, I could just see where this was heading.

It was mostly the boy who kneaded that mud and scooped the mud with his hands. The girl looked at her brother's handiwork, saw that I was watching, then grinned. The kneading turned to mashing, the mashing to smacking, big clumps of mud flying up and making dalmatian spots on them, the driveway, everywhere. The girl laughed and laughed. She gave me a conspiratory glance and I joined in the laughter, too.

The mom came out. "Oh my. Don't you REALLY dare come in here now."

***
I feel like a kid again when I:

eat Cheetos and lick my fingers
go on picnics
feed the ducks in the pond
float on my back in a swimming pool and watch the clouds
swim and get my hair wet (and not worry about how I look)
save a toy china set my daughters no longer want & have a tea party
dance to happy music
pick flowers
play with paper dolls
buy a gumball from the machine

***
What makes YOU feel like a kid again?

A New Guneration

2010-08-21T17:53:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "When he was young, I told Dale Jr. that hunting and racing are a lot alike. Holding that steering wheel and holding that rifle both mean you better be responsible." - Dale Earnhardt

photo by Termin8ter on Flickr

Today, I watched my 12 year old son take a shooting test at the police range to complete his hunter safety class. My husband could not take him because he was coaching a soccer team at a game my son had to miss for this shooting test. It was a funny division of labor because I have this fear of guns and I kept reminding my son to point the muzzle of his unloaded rifle up into the air, just in case, to the rhythm of my son rolling his eyes. My son knew what to do; I just had to get him there.

I don't particularly like guns, but I'm glad my son knows how to handle them safely. I grew up in the city, where guns did not mean shooting at Bambi; it meant people could get hurt. Or worse, killed. Where my dad carried it for his own protection and I only held it once as he was making a point that I should learn how to use a gun someday because it is an unsafe world out there. I held it, cold powerful metal in my hands, handed it back and shook my head. Later, much later, when I was married several years to my husband who hunts, I took a gun safety course and finally got to the point where I could touch a gun and not hyperventilate.

Today my son loaded bullets in a rifle with steady nerves and a sure eye on a paper rabbit and squirrel.

Funny how things can change with each generation.

Recharged

2010-08-12T07:57:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "My ideas usually come not at my desk writing but in the midst of living." - Anais Nin

photo: me, writing on my favorite rock at Lake Powell

Great news on many counts!

1. Just got back from a Lake Powell vacation where I was unplugged for a week and wrote on my Alphasmart in the cool mornings before everyone was up. Was inspired to write a new song called Here. So fun to create this in one morning. Still tweaking the melody, but hope to get a song put together and share after catching up with reality.

2. While at Lake Powell, I wrote most of a short story which just might be the synopsis of a historical novel.

3. Got word that my "Holiday Hiccups" short story placed honorable mention in the Women On Writing flash fiction contest. I changed it a bit for the contest, but here is my original piece. Feels great to get validated. They capped entries at 300 and mine made it to the top 25!

4. Recharged and raring to go!

***
Friends, thanks for visiting and commenting. I hope to reciprocate soon!

How is YOUR life going?

Serenity

2010-07-31T08:37:00.009-06:00

Pink Think: "Your days are short here; this is the last of your springs. And now in the serenity and quiet of this lovely place, touch the depths of truth, feel the hem of Heaven. You will go away with old, good friends. And don't forget when you leave why you came." - Adlai E. Stevenson

photo of the gardens at Frankfort, Kentucky's Liberty Hall

There used to be a time when I measured my worth by how much I wrote and how much I performed.

I feel the ebb and flow of life around me and a serenity inside. I feel like I am more present to my kids nowadays. I write when I am inspired but I am not obsessive about it. I watch other writers spin and toil and cheer them on, but I don't have the compulsion to race alongside them.

I don't know how the change came about, but change it has nonetheless. And it is a good place.

The other day, I decided to splurge on my girls after two mornings of weeding and took them to get frozen yogurt. It dented my "guitar amplifier fund" but you know what, it was worth every penny.

I will still be singing years from now but my kids won't be little for long.

I will still be writing my novels someday, but my kids want to live our story today.

This peace, this serenity is like a breath of cool morning air midst a lush garden: a quiet optimistic joy. Complete.

A Dose of Southern Charm

2010-07-27T08:49:00.010-06:00

Pink Think: " Soon after, I returned home to my family, with a determination to bring them as soon as possible to live in Kentucky, which I esteemed a second paradise, at the risk of my life and fortune." - Daniel Boone

photo of a Lexington horse farm from Wikipedia

Back from a fantabulous 6-day trip to Lexington, Kentucky with my 14 year old daughter!

My favorites:

-The peace and serenity of watching jockeys and trainers "breeze" their horses at Keeneland Race Track. Went there twice early in the morn before the heat hit and could have just stayed there the whole day.

-Watching my horse-crazy daughter's face light up at being in her dream vacation place (our kids each get a chance to pick out a vacation destination and use our credit card reward points...and she picked Breyerfest at Lexington...and I got to go with her).

-Driving the scenic byways past horse farms and lush green pastures. I have heard of the rolling hills of Kentucky, but to see it first-hand was just amazing. I can't believe that on the other side of the country (where I live in Utah), there's such a thing as desert.

-Joining a horse farm tour at the last minute, thanks to the kindness of an employee. (Most people have to book months in advance)

-Spending time and laughing and being adventuresome with my daughter. Picnicking at unusual places, like an empty baseball park. Eating out with her at places she picked out (she did good!).

-Driving a rented red-hot Camaro and staying safe on the roads in an unfamiliar place.

-Experiencing southern hospitality and charm. I maybe heard someone honk their horn at me once as I slow-pokily drove some roads. Most everyone was very nice and friendly: from giving us a five minute parking spot so we can take a pic of Churchill Downs (60 miles away in Louisville) the same night as a concert (that was crazy!), to a trainer giving us some old horseshoes from his Keeneland stall, to everyone saying "ma'am" and "pardon me".

-Visiting cemeteries, like the one in Frankfort, just 15 minutes from Lexington, where Daniel Boone (quoted above) is buried.

Talking Shop

2010-07-16T07:34:00.010-06:00

Pink Think: "Being around people with whom you feel a connection, on many levels, not just a professional one, is very relaxing." - Jacqueline Bisset

illustration from fruitcake.plus.com

After 18 years of marriage, my husband still manages to surprise me. Sure, he always orders cheese enchiladas no fail at our local Mexican favorite. And the server at the Chinese restaurant usually asks him, "The usual?"

But then, there's the time I came home from vacation and he had gone out and bought a new dining room set (which fortunately I loved). And that time when he told me nonchalantly that he had been looking into donating a kidney (which he did).

And then there was last night. He told me he sent a query to an agent about a middle-grade novel he had written about a decade ago. After I picked up my jaw off the floor, I felt some interesting emotions. I was excited for him! I was amazed. And a little out of sorts.

My husband, querying? I've known about his novel for a while. It's awesome, but...

Over the years, we've kept the lines drawn. He does his veterinary career and sled-dog races and off-roading, while I do my writing and music. I have my groups, and he has his groups. Works well that way. He doesn't need to get an earful of my most recent plot crisis, and I don't have to walk the rest of the dirt road while he navigates a wicked pothole. Our different interests recharge us individuals and make us a stronger couple.

But now.

He said it's taken him this long because he's worried I wouldn't like it if he gets agented first. He's afraid I'll be jealous.

I must admit, after he told me his news, I felt like speeding up on my own projects, so I can be querying again. And yes, the competitive person in me hopes I can beat him. Extra motivation, if you will. I've also teased him that he'll have to look into getting his own blog, something he's been resisting for years.

Now, we can talk shop. How cool is that? We're in for some interesting times.

***
How about YOU? Do you and your significant other share the same profession/interests? How well does that work out? And if you don't share the same profession/interests, how do you still keep connected?

Happy House

2010-07-13T00:03:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "Where thou art, that is home." - Emily Dickinson

photo from Daily Bungalow on Flickr

First, an aside: an article I wrote about a local man who is very passionate about astronomy got published the other day. I really enjoyed writing this profile, especially since I asked my editor if I could bump it up to twice as long as I usually do. It's really hard, in 600 words, to write someone's life story. So I had fun going more in depth.

***
Quiet on the fiction front. Just summering for the moment. And looking at lots of house plans (we hope to sell our house so we can build a home on horse property), trying to find ones that both my husband and I agree on. I am leaning towards Craftsman (see example in photo above). I've always loved that look, probably because of the color and old-fashioned charm. We drove today through a sprawling subdivision with lots of this style, where all the houses were so different and alive with color. If we wanted to live anywhere near there, I would want us to move there in a heartbeat! I love love love color.

I was reminded about this house style the other day, when I was having one of our saddles repaired at this guy's house on a quiet rural street. I looked west and saw a beautiful house. It had olive green plank board, yellow shaker shingles along the gables, with a red door. After I got the saddle, I went over and talked to the owners.

They invited me short of looking in their house ("It's a mess!") and I said it was no problem at all, I could come back. I mostly stood around speechless because this 30-something couple had put a lot of their heart and personality into their living space. The lady raises waterwise plants and landscapes professionally; the guy built the house himself with the help of some sub-contractors. The lawn meandered, past a gorgeous fire pit with chairs nestled around, to a stone courtyard and a very inviting back porch.

"Is your house for sale?" I joked. The husband smiled and shook his head.

I went home energized and told my husband, "I know now what I like in a house!"

***
I want to live in a house where the cool aquamarine walls and seashells and white trim and striped fabric remind me of the beach. Where a hammock is strung on the front porch and beads of condensation form like crystal on a tall glass of lemonade. I want to go barefoot on the deck and roast marshmallows with my kids over a fire pit full of glinting jeweled coals. I want to make dinner of shrimp and scallops in a crisp salad at the kitchen while I watch the kids ride their horses from the back windows. I want to step out onto the back porch and look up at the stars and breathe and maybe even strum out a song or two on the ol' gui-tar. I want window-seats with a teetering stack of books; a pingpong table in the basement and a circle of red chairs right smack in the middle for visiting; rugs in bright colors and doors in colors other than white. I want a living room that opens up to a generous front porch lined with geraniums spilling out of pots.

(Funny thing is, though some of the details in my dream home are different than in the one I live in now, I can honestly say I come home to my present house and feel the energy of color and the warmth of family!)

That's my idea of a house that makes me happy. What's YOURS?

OR, what makes YOU happy in your present home?

Lyric to My Melody

2010-07-07T00:49:00.000-06:00

Pink Think: "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." - Mignon McLaughlin

I wrote this song, You're Lyric to My Melody, in the spring of 2010. I had initially written it as a "secret love" sort of song, and my 14 year old daughter said, diplomatically, "I don't like the lyrics". So I rewrote it into this love song, and I am forever grateful to my daughter who is a fabulous first listener/reader.

This song is dedicated to my darling husband, who is the Lyric to my Melody. We will be celebrating our 18th wedding anniversary on Saturday!

Seriously (Not!)

2010-06-29T07:28:00.004-06:00

Pink Think: "I also found child's play - stuff that was not considered serious, but goofy - was the stuff I liked to do, so I still do it as an adult." - Matt Groening
Art from maraftim.blogfa.com

Just got word that I made the first round of judging in an online flash fiction contest. Will know if I won in July. I submitted a piece that I wrote tongue-in-cheek in response to a fellow blogger who said he had the hiccups and that wasn't good as a surgical tech. I had fun writing that piece.

Really, the funnest pieces to write are the ones where I am not taking myself seriously and just write what comes to me. But sometimes when I overthink, or when I try to be funny, I usually come off flat.

***
Yesterday, I found shade under the only tree at a mobile home park near a movie theater where my kids were watching their weekly movie fix (thanks to the PTA, what a cool idea for parents that need a little bit of me-time!). Then I proceeded to end weeks-long drought by writing more towards my current story. Decided to write goofy just to have fun so that I could be in keeping with my initial premise "This is going to be a NOT serious story!"

Speaking of a novel that started out goofy, then turned solemn, I was reading Jessica's Guide to Dating on the Dark Side a couple of weeks ago. Loved the opening. Loved the goofiness. Then it changed towards the end, more dark and serious, and well, I was disappointed. The moral of the story: if you are going to set up your readers for humor, then consistency is the key.

But it is hard. I know, because I have tried. That breezy, funny way of storytelling is just something that comes or doesn't at the first try. Comes from that part in your brain that distills the quirkiness of life and shapes it into something fun!

***
What makes YOU laugh?

Delights of Summer

2010-06-21T06:21:00.006-06:00

Pink Think: "Among the delights of Summer were picnics to the woods." - Georg Brandes

jean skirts
summer glow
barefoot days
picnics
swimming
beach reading
library trips
no deadlines
no apologies
no guilt
sleeping in
my kids' deepening tan
making family into friends
being unplugged
guitar-playing
burgers at pit stops
coco butter lotion

***
What are YOUR summer delights?

If I Were To Sail Away

2010-06-13T06:28:00.005-06:00

Pink Think: "I must go down to the sea again, to the lonely sea and the sky; and all I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by." - John Masefield

art from bergoiata.org

Friends: I've been away for a youth conference for my church. Had a grand time though it was raining most of the time. Came back to my home in the west desert to more cloudy skies and more rain.

My plants and yard are green and gorgeous.

Makes me think though, I might need a boat after all this rain. My "boat" would be an 18th century ship from Spain.

***
Won't you play along? What would YOURS be like?

The House That Built Me

2010-06-07T07:01:00.005-06:00

Pink Think: "And so much of my life has been about returning home and longing for home, wanting my children to know about my roots. And I thought I can't be the only one to feel this way so I thought it would be an interesting topic to explore." -Sela Ward

One of my favorite songs to sing on acoustic guitar is Miranda Lambert's The House That Built Me. The song makes me ache for the wonder and simplicity of childhood, returning to my roots; not to cling to the past, but to remember it with fondness. Here is my version:

***
Over the years, I've written a lot of stories about the Philippines, my childhood home, but I also consider Logan, Utah, my hometown. These are the houses that built me:

A unit in a government housing project called BLISS. Some mornings I woke to the smell of the papaya tree, the sun filtering gently through thin green curtains; the scent of wet earth in the back when I played house; a stream nearby which caught my imagination as a child and writer. My dad built shelves in the living room, and between the books we owned and trips to the British Embassy library, I read and read and read.

An apartment in Logan, Utah, where I went to college at fifteen with my mom. We lived upstairs on the third floor, in a little studio apartment with green carpet, between a Finnish and Iranian lady; a breathtaking view through tall poplars of my small college/farming community. Lots of firsts: international friendships and American experiences. My mom and I became friends, and I changed my major from business to English, a turning point in my life.

***
How about YOU? Tell me about the house that built you.

Rain

2010-06-01T08:40:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "Some people walk in the rain, others just get wet." - Roger Miller*

photo by dyrk.wyst on flickr

This endless rain beats a tattoo,
a memory of a tropical place
where I grew my writer's wings.

I was twelve when we moved
to a government housing project
that was more concrete than castle.

I tended an orchard
by way of a meandering stream
full of slow dragonflies I liked to catch

until the heartbreaking day
we were told the land was not
ours to tend after all.

So instead

on my way to school
I skipped over puddles
filled with little tadpoles.

No matter what I did
I couldn't stay dry in my shoes
which left blue on my ankle-high socks;

got wet under my umbrella,
and cold through my red sweater
that said "Hug Me".

Still, on stormy days

if we were lucky
we got to stay home in the dark
no electricity, just candles;

making wax figures
and trading ghost stories till we quaked
like the trees outside.

After school, on weekends

my room was my refuge from Rain
where I wrote my stories
on a gray typewriter.

Today

I live in the desert
but when the rain comes down
as it has a lot lately...

I am back in my childhood home again.

*Confidential to Drew: I just had to use this Roger Miller quote

***
Do YOU like rain? Why or why not?

New Love

2010-05-26T07:33:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "The suspense of a novel is not only in the reader, but in the novelist, who is intensely curious about what will happen to the hero." - Mary McCarthy

photo by mustloveme2010 on photobucket

I am in the throes of new love.

So much so that I when I am not with this new object of affection, I think about it constantly.

When I come back to it, it is just pure pleasure, with all the excitement of discovery and newness.

I am in love with my newest story.

It's a young adult urban fantasy about a Filipino-American boy who spends a summer in the Philippines and falls in love with a girl who has a monstrous secret.

Why I love it, let me count the ways:

1. I get to write from a wise-cracking boy point of view.
2. I get to write from the POV of an American.
3. When I write scary scenes, I scare even myself.
4. I wrote a synopsis, so I have some idea what's going to happen...
5. ...which means it's a viable story...
6. ...but I am still surprised by the twists and turns.
7. The characters are quirky and distinct.
8. I don't have to do tons of research.

Just like any new romance, I worry about the novelty fading, that I will find some imperfection that will turn me off, that I will get bored...

Ah well. I will enjoy this ride while I can. I honestly don't give a fig if this story gets published. I just want to see what happens next.

A New Journal

2010-05-19T08:35:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "I write journals and would recommend journal writing to anyone who wishes to pursue a writing career. You learn a lot. You also remember a lot... and memory is important." - Judy Collins

photo: my new journal

The other day, while I was out shopping for my parents' birthdays at Barnes & Noble, I decided to get myself a new journal. I stood in front of this wall of at least four shelves of journals feeling like I was making a Very Important Choice. I gravitated towards the pink ones, but some didn't seem sturdy enough for camping trips, which is usually when I write like crazy in my journal.

***
I used to be more prolific writing in journals. Wrote in them daily, no fail, some years. With little kids, which surprises me now. Downstairs, in our basement, there is a little shelf that holds all of my journals from when I was a college student, a young wife and a young mother. I've written in all sorts of books: cheap spiral bound notebooks, steno pads, "real" bound journals with the word "Journal" written in a flourish on the cover with my name embossed on it, fancy hand-bound ones.

I already had one at home the day I was browsing at Barnes & Noble, just a little cheapie college notebook. I liked its pinkness, but I don't know, it just felt, well, dispensable. Not a very special place for special thoughts.

***
So I stood there feeling a little underwhelmed by my choices. It was either this paisley like sophisticated number that I hoped would hold up to a week in Lake Powell, or a cute Hello Kitty one that was covered in this rubber material, but whose novelty I worried would fade quickly.

And then from the corner of my eye, I found it. A purple sky with coconut trees. The last one of its kind in its spot. The journal that said Perfect.

When I look at the cover, I am transported back to the Philippines, and I am homesick. A little. Enough to open something soft and yielding in me, calling for me to divulge my secrets. It would be like a homecoming to open the cover and write on the pages; to ponder and remember.

***
Do YOU keep a journal? What is it like?

Me, As a Mermaid

2010-05-18T07:59:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: “I think every little girl's dream is to be a mermaid or to see a mermaid. [When I was younger] I would go to the beach and cover myself in the sand. People from different cultures and centuries have the same idea of what mermaids are ... so that's maybe a cool thing to think about.” - Emma Roberts
The very talented writer and artist Elizabeth Mueller recently turned me into a mermaid.

She had asked for ideas of art on her clip art blog, and I said "hibiscus flower". Then I got more specific and said, "an Asian mermaid with a hibiscus flower in her hair". Was pleasantly surprised when she turned my idea into a portrait of me. How cool is that? Thank you Elizabeth!

(My oldest daughter looked at it and said it was good. Then she added, sounding relieved, "At least she drew you modestly.")

A few months ago, I started a fantasy novel about mermaids in the Philippines, but didn't get past a few chapters. If I do decide to pick it up again, I'll have this art to inspire me.

***
Have YOU ever written a story inspired by a piece of art or picture?

My Salsa Days & 3-Book Giveaway

2010-05-14T07:10:00.016-06:00

Pink Think: "Anytime you do something Latino, yeah, I love the color, the spice." - Esai Morales

*Update: This contest is now closed. Congratulations to our winner, Adriana!*

When I was in college, I discovered the magic and allure of Latino culture. I was a freshman in America from the Philippines, sixteen and rooming with my mom. Utah State University had a big international student population, and I got involved in a club where most of the officers came from South America.

I still remember one of our outings after a dance, my beautiful friend Lorena from Venezuela drove me and some other people up to Chi-Chi's, a chic Mexican restaurant on Main Street, where we talked and laughed over delicious tortilla chips and salsa. Although I drank virgin pina colada to their cerveza, those friendships sparked my lifelong love affair with the Latin culture.

I didn't speak Spanish yet, but I found the language seductive. As a Filipina, I was familiar with a lot of Spanish terms since the Philippines had been colonized by Spain for 300 years and left its indelible mark on our language. Eventually, I took two years of Spanish, and was a class short of a Spanish minor. I wanted to go to Mexico for a semester, but couldn't afford it. So I did the next best thing: I attended mass in Spanish and went out with a few guys from South America.

I thought for sure I would marry a Spanish-speaker, but then I met a Utah guy who would later be my husband. He didn't speak Spanish and he felt self-conscious about dancing the sensual merengue, salsa, or cumbia. He spoke Korean (which he learned on a church mission) but cooked a mean taco. I traded my wild, senorita days for Love and the respectability of marriage.

But some days, when I hear a pulsating merengue or salsa beat, I come alive, take my husband by the hand and we twirl around playfully in our own little casita.

***
To celebrate May being Latino Books Month, I am hosting a book giveaway (courtesy of Hatchette Group) to one lucky winner for three books of your choice from the following:

Try to Remember By Iris Gomez (read my Q& A with Iris here)
Hot (broke) Messes By Nancy Trejos
Waking Up in the Land of Glitter By Kathy Cano-Murillo
Little Nuggets of Wisdom By Chuy Bravo, Tom Brunelle
Lone Star Legend By Gwendolyn Zepeda
Into the Beautiful North By Luis Alberto Urrea
Amigoland By Oscar Casares

To enter, leave a comment in answer to this question:

If you were to get stranded on a Carribean island with one of these Latino celebrities, who would you choose: Jennifer Lopez, Cheech Marin , Gabriel Garcia Marquez, or Antonio Banderas?

US & Canada, No PO Boxes. Deadline: Sunday, May 23

*Update: We have a winner. Congratulations, Adriana!*

Passion

2010-05-12T07:40:00.005-06:00

Pink Think: "Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you." - Oprah Winfrey

photo by HellKat on flickr

Last night, at a fun mother-daughter night at our church, I had the privilege of singing the song Turn Around as part of the program. I was asked when one of the organizers found out I knew how to play the guitar. I've been singing for years, but many in the audience later told me they had no idea I could sing like that. One lady said, "I didn't know you were talented!" (which sounds kind of funny if you think about it)

The only reason I share this is not to toot my own horn, but to marvel that in the last year or so, people - some whom I've known for a long time - seem astounded that I, quiet, reserved Jewel, could sing. I've been singing pretty much all my life. Why the change?

It comes down to this, I think: I have more confidence in myself and I sing songs that are within my vocal range (alto). That is...singing for a rock band last year validated me. Singing to the guitar has been helpful in finding my vocal range because I can usually transpose to lower chords. (That plus tamping down the voice that sneers, "Who do you think you are, a singer?" or "But you'll be forty in two years, m'dear!")

I'm not sure what I'm going to do with my singing/guitar. Performing is such a rush for me, like the other night when I sang at open mic. It's the sweetest feeling to share a message with an audience through song. The acoustic guitar is such an intimate instrument. When I sing, I make myself vulnerable and free fall, yet by risking that, I can cross a barrier and connect. When I look up and see emotion in people's eyes or smiles, I know I did my job. (The same kind of rush I get when I write a story and people "get" it.)

Since I pick my own songs, I can make the experience as uplifting as I want it to be. So I've been thinking more and more about booking some gigs here and there. And maybe even coming up with more of my own songs. But I write, too, both as a journalist and novelist. The weeks I perform or write songs, my other writing slides by the wayside.

Music can continue to enrich my life, I know. It's just striking that fine balance.

***
What are YOUR passions and how do you balance them all?

Like Dew Drops

2010-05-10T23:44:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "Our moments of inspiration are not lost though we have no particular poem to show for them; for those experiences have left an indelible impression, and we are ever and anon reminded of them." - Henry David Thoreau

photo by sininggingi on flickr

There's a story spilling out
from a world I haven't
been to yet.

Words pretty like dew drops
tantalizing and new,
alive in the morning.

I worry they'll disappear
come the afternoon
but they pool beautifully.

I marvel at being chosen
to be the recipient
from the morning Master

of dew drops
of music
of stories

I will take them as they come
and collect drop by drop
the blessing of song and prose.

A Case For Humor

2010-05-06T13:25:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "If you could choose one characteristic that would get you through life, choose a sense of humor." - Jennifer Jones

photo by Bill Gracey on Flickr

I have a gazillion things to do and I need to prep for my day (which includes an open mic tonight - more on this later) but I just had to write a quick post about my son's campaign.

He's going into junior high next year and ran for class historian (one of four positions) and won. Woo-hoo!!

Apart from the (a) surprise on my part that my usually reserved son put himself out there ("I don't know if I want to be historian, but campaigning sounds fun") and (b) joy in seeing my son do well, I thought I would dissect his campaigning a little because it makes me think of how humor is so important in anything - marriage, books, songs, you name it.

My son's tactic: humor. All the candidates got to put up 12 posters and create a short video. He drew a lot of pun-filled messages and cartoons. Then he and another friend created a hilarious video about Ding-Dongs. (The day they showed everyone's video, he said a lot were just straightforward, and not really trying for funny.) I'm sure the fact that my son seems generally well-liked at school contributed to his winning, too.

***
There are a lot of things clamoring for our attention nowadays. To stand out, funniness usually helps.

We don't always have to be funny. That would just be plain tiring. But look at songs, stories, books - funny handled well usually floats to the top. That's why I gush over my recent reads like Dan Wells' I Am Not a Serial Killer and Alexander McCall Smith's Friends, Lovers and Chocolate - it's because interspersed in the macabre and the cozy mystery are gems of humor.

Men are that they might have joy. I need to get out of my cave and take note of the sunshine!

Balance

2010-05-05T08:38:00.006-06:00

Pink Think: "I would be lying if I said journalism doesn't reflect my own choices as a reporter and a writer: what to say, what to emphasize, how to say it, what is true or untrue." - David Simon

photo by stonemen on flickr

I interviewed a man last week for a profile. Usually I write 600-word pieces which is just not enough to go in depth, so I asked my editor if I could bump up the length. His answer: sure.

Cool beans, as my hubby would say. So I met with my subject at a restaurant and established a rapport. Chit chatted a little, then sequed into questions amidst the noise of a blender in the background. He was very nice and willing to open up about his life story, warts and all, in two hours.

It felt both a blessing and a burden.

A blessing because for two hours, you get to know someone more than just the superficial. You realize that this person who seems all-knowing and successful is insecure just like the rest of us. That to get where they are, they had to surmount many obstacles. You come away inspired.

A burden because now their life is now in your hands to portray to the world. It's a daunting and scary task. To be selective. To stay honest and yet compassionate. To share the story of an imperfect human being that would be reading your words later on. And possibly believing them about himself.

I am grateful for the opportunity, but it's a tricky balance.

Try to Remember Q&A, Book Giveaway

2010-05-03T12:22:00.013-06:00

Pink Think: "Whatever might happen, I'd believed in my parents' dream: that Miami would make up for the long lost warmth, balconies, stars, and fishermen of Cartagena de Indias - the small Carribean port city where I'd been born." - teenage protagonist Gabi from the novel Try to Remember

I had the pleasure recently of savoring Try To Remember, National Poetry Prize-winner Iris Gomez' debut novel. The story resonated with me, as a first-generation immigrant to America from the Philippines. This is one of those books that made me linger with pleasure over the lyrical passages.

Book summary from Iris Gomez' website: Culturally savvy Colombian teenager Gabriela de la Paz, newly arrived in Miami, is a devoted daughter who is trying to keep her volatile and mentally ill father from jeopardizing their family’s green card status and driving them all into exile in disgrace. But as her father slips deeper into darkness and her mother slips deeper into denial, it is Gabi alone who must face the impending family crisis and ultimately decide for herself whether love means more than loyalty.

Here's a Q&A Iris graciously gave me (Thank you Iris!). Read to the end for a chance to win one of three copies. Update: This contest is now closed. Thanks to everyone who entered!

1. When did you first know or decide you were a writer?

As long as I can remember, I’ve gotten a thrill out of reading a great book. Maybe that’s what inspired me to start playing with words myself when I was a teenager. I used to use English, Spanish, and French class assignments to write long, complicated sentences composed of words that sounded beautiful to me. I also loved the challenge of creating poems that rhymed. Then, when I was chosen to be editor for my high school newspaper, I realized that writing could be a career option as well as interesting and fun.

2. How did you come up with the idea for this novel? Why did you choose to write about this time period?

The core inspiration was my desire to write a story about the “good” Latina who wants to be loyal to her family and yet is torn by external and internal forces that are pulling her away. This idea came from my own experience of growing up between two cultures with very different expectations of feminine success: could you love your family and yet be independent of them? I didn’t really know myself for a long time, and I think that although that is a quintessential coming-of-age question, it takes a particularly intense form in the context of a traditional Latino immigrant family like Gabi’s, especially one that is in crisis and desperately trying to hold on to its tried-and-true values while adjusting to those of mainstream U.S. society.

I chose the time period I did (late 60s/early 70s) because I was interested in the story of how Miami came of age too, and this was the time in Miami’s history when it began to grow from a largely undeveloped and predominantly Anglo-American, almost a backwaters, Southern city into the giant, international & multicultural cosmopolis one now finds.

3. How long did it take you to write "Try To Remember"? Describe your process from first draft to final version. Did you outline or "just write"?

Five years. I have a wonderful but challenging “day job” as an immigrant rights attorney, and I am also the mother of two, so it took me about three years to write the book and another two to revise & edit it into its publication state.

My process began with “just writing” pieces and scenes until I had enough text to understand for myself what was holding it all together, and then I wrote the outline for the whole book. Later on, I created trajectory charts for each of the main characters, since each of them is transformed in a different way by what happens in the course of the novel.

4. Some of the passages involving mental illness and Gabi's father were vividly scary. How did you prepare yourself to write those scenes?

I was able to draw on the positive lessons I’ve learned from my own experiences in overcoming adversity and from the shared experiences of other people I’ve known or worked with who witnessed or suffered different forms of violence, from domestic violence to torture and persecution. The most important of these lessons, I believe, is the resilience of the human heart, and I tried to impart that to Gabi as the home situation with her father grew increasingly more frightening.

5. What is your daily writing routine?

My main writing “practice” is morning journaling. Sometimes this writing turns into actual text I later set aside time to develop into prose or poetry, but more than anything this is a spiritual exercise that frees me to think, feel, invent, and imagine without any censorship right onto the page.

6. How did you get your literary agent? What genre did you pitch this novel as?

I submitted a part of my manuscript for evaluation at a writing conference. I pitched it as women’s fiction, although I recognize that it has appeal for young adult audiences as well.

7. A lot of your passages have a melodic cadence to them, with lyrical metaphors. How did your poet background help you in writing this novel?

Lyrical writing comes naturally to me because of reading and writing a lot of poetry, at least in comparison with some of my fiction writer friends who’ve told me that they have to consciously apply themselves when “painting” a picture in passages they wish to be more evocative or poetic.

I also think that growing up bilingual has helped me write more lyrically, because I can hear things in the cadences of the two languages and become more attentive to the choices I have about how a sentence or paragraph should sound.

8. How did you make that switch from poet to novelist?

For me, it was largely a question of time. When I was just writing poetry, I could work on single poems or a few related poems in isolated bursts of time, but for me to be able to write a novel I knew would require a predictable and consistent chunk of regular time, particularly as the text grew and the characters evolved. So, it was only when my kids were old enough and my work situation permitted me a little more flexibility that I was able to plan on having enough of the kind of time my novel required.

9. Which do you like better, writing poetry or novels, and why?

What I love about fiction is that it enables me to explore a wider range of experiences and subject matter than I’ve been able to do in poetry, at least so far. On the other hand, there is something so great about writing a poem that doesn’t necessarily have to be about a topic but aims toward some elemental truth or beauty.

10. From your experience, how interested are publishers in multicultural fiction nowadays?

I have worked with a very knowledgeable and skilled multicultural team at my publishing house, but I don’t have enough experience with other big houses to comment generally. I do know that the changing demographics of the U.S. affects everything from voting power to consumption of goods – and that the publishing industry can be no exception.

11. What writing projects are you working on right now?

I have two projects in the works, another novel about a young Latina who is a little wilder than Gabi in TRY TO REMEMBER, and a nonfiction book that will explore the cultural links between the old colonial port cities of the original Spanish Imperial Maritime Road.

12. My 14 year old daughter loves to write poetry and would love to have her collection published someday. Any advice on how to break into poetry anthologies?

The most important message I would impart is to keep on writing, whether it gets published now or not. I would also look for opportunities to enroll in programs for young writers. For example, here in Boston I belong to Grub Street, Inc. which has a terrific program for teen writers. Once she feels ready to send out her work, she should spend a little time reading some of the poetry journals and deciding which ones seem like they would provide a comfortable home for her work. Lastly, depending on what kind of poetry she writes, she may want to try open mike readings at local venues, both to experience that kind of poetry event and to connect with other poets and the small press poetry community that many poets are part of.

13. What is the best writing advice you've ever gotten?

To thine own self be true.

***
Update: This contest is now closed. Thanks to everyone who entered!

Book Giveaway: Thanks to Hatchette Book Group, I can pick as many as three winners for a copy of Try to Remember. To enter, leave a comment answering the question, "What do you miss most from home?" Rules: no PO Boxes, US and Canada only. Deadline: Sunday, May 9.

Shiny New

2010-04-29T00:01:00.000-06:00

Pink Think: "It's really clear to me that you can't hang onto something longer than its time. Ideas lose certain freshness, ideas have a shelf life, and sometimes they have to be replaced by other ideas." - Alan Alda

photo from edtechroundup.wikispaces.com

After attending a fabulous writer's conference this weekend, I'm ready to get back to work. Yesterday, just for fun, I sat down at my computer and whipped out some story ideas based on a) my interests, b) the market and c) what doesn't require years of research.

(I don't know how some writers come up with solid historical fiction in such a short period of time. Or maybe I just don't see all the sweat and blood that goes into this. I just need to get my head out of research right now so I can write fresh again.)

I came up with a couple of solid ideas, the kind that sound like actual book blurbs. Which shocked me. I can't even come up with summaries for the stories I've already been working on for years, but these came to me easily. What's up with that?

I'm excited. They are both contemporary YA but as different as night and day. One is tween comedy-romance with a girl protagonist. The other is horror with a boy protagonist. I'm going to tackle the latter first.

I find boys easier to write for some reason; probably because I can just be chockful of suspense and adventure, and my reader doesn't clamor for more emotion or description.(When I write my horror fiction, my readers usually don't say, "More emotion please!" At the writer's conference, readers of my historical women's fiction said, "More please!")

I am a little scared of writing contemporary from the point of view of a girl. I realized I have pretty much written historical novels because in some ways it's easier, like I don't need to worry about language or sex. My daughter will be in high school next year. She will have to be my bona fide spy and fact checker.

***
Speaking of my daughter, she's recovering well from her knee surgery. I'm having to keep up with her. She put me under a gag order to not ask her every 15 minutes if she's okay. Our biggest challenge now is she wants to run! Shoot baskets! Ride horses! I saw this coming, so I bought lots of rope from the hardware store so I can tie her to a chair. Ha! As if it were possible to curb this spitfire.

On the freelancing front, I have an assignment to profile a NASA astronomer. I'm excited. I've never been to this observatory and it'll be a good excuse to go. Just like with other interviews I've done, I'm thinking, "What if a woman fell in love with a man who was an astronomer..?"

What is new, with YOU?

Among Friends

2010-04-26T09:02:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "Friends... they cherish one another's hopes. They are kind to one another's dreams." - Henry David Thoreau

My bootcamp buddies (l-r): the witty Melanie Jacobson, the amazing Josi Kilpack, me, and the imaginative Kim Coates

Just got back from LDStorymakers Conference this past weekend. After getting ready for it for the past few months, I was excited to finally be there!

My thoughts:

I learned YA is hot and historical is not. Should I make Ghost Moon Night fully YA or keep revising When the Jasmine Blooms? I will not abandon my historical, but why not go with my most commercially viable book? Plus, if I don't do it, awesome cheerleader extraordinaire Shirley Bahlmann will get on my case.

At the last minute, sharing a hotel room with a friend fell through, so I got to just pamper myself in my own room, my own king-size bed, my own time to go to bed. I wrote a little on my Alphasmart, but my brain was kind of mush after all the terrific sessions.

There were about 500 participants this record-breaking year. I remember a time when the "biggest room" was maybe one-fifth of the ballroom. And all of us want to get published! It's both cool and daunting. There is so much talent...and supportive vibes.

I saw an author who has now become very successful kind of shrink into themself, not wanting anyone but published authors to talk to them. And then there are other authors who are so giving with their smile and conversation. I want to be like the latter someday, when I am a published novelist.

When. Right. You heard me. When.

For Sale

2010-04-13T12:36:00.005-06:00

Pink Think: "All architecture is shelter, all great architecture is the design of space that contains, cuddles, exalts, or stimulates the persons in that space." -Philip Johnson

photo by ukaaa on flickr

Today, we put our house up for sale. The hope is, once we sell our house, we will buy horse property so we can have our horses in our backyard.

Our realtor's assistant went through the house taking pictures for the listing. For the past few weeks, our family has deep cleaned our house so well we joke that we should sell our house every year so it'd be this clean and uncluttered.

I don't like the stress of selling, but I do like the feeling of a clean, tidy house. I feel light, spacious and serene.

As J was walking through, I winced at spots I had missed. Scuff marks on the doors. I imagined my vibrant paint choices through a stranger's eyes. I painted not necessarily thinking of resale. I painted it for my enjoyment. I felt like apologizing, then I straightened my shoulders and lifted my chin. Why should I feel bad about painting my house colors that made me and my family happy?

***
This experience made me think of my books. When my critique partners look at my stories, or an agent looks at my first chapter or query, all of a sudden I notice all these dings and shortcomings. Thing is, no manuscript will ever be perfect. At a certain point, I just need to stop and call it good. Put it up "for sale" and open it up to the world.

My book should please first and foremost myself. Else, why write it? The best thing I can do is to polish it to the best of my ability, and shop it around to the world unapologetically and bravely. Vibrant colors and all.

Thankful

2010-04-10T00:01:00.002-06:00

Pink Think: "Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough." - Oprah Winfrey

photo from mondosonoro.com

Enough of the wallow!

***
Thursday, we found out my daughter would have to have knee surgery which would involve a 6-month rehab. As we sat waiting for the doctor to come tell us more about the procedure, I noticed the exam room's walls held photos of former patients.

A skier. A lacrosse player. A gymnast. A tennis player.

The photos were all signed by the former patients, expressing gratitude to the doctor for giving them a new lease in life.

I looked at my daughter sitting bravely awaiting her fate, hopeful for better days this doctor will give her. Someday, she'll have her own picture on the wall, of her doing amazing things.

***
I am thankful for

a beautiful family
brilliant surgeons
health insurance
the Savior

my daughter's positive attitude
her overall good health
her stellar basketball season
her friends

the freedom to write stories
an interesting freelance career
terrific friends
supportive relatives

sunshine!
dental floss
cotton candy
watermelon twist gum

***
What are YOU thankful for today?

Rewrite Please

2010-04-09T01:02:00.008-06:00

Pink Think: "The very greatest things - great thoughts, discoveries, inventions - have usually been nurtured in hardship, often pondered over in sorrow, and at length established with difficulty." - Samuel Smiles

photo from albones.com

I crave a rewrite
not of a novel nor article
but the ending of a day.

Took my 14 year old to the doctor
to see why her knee swells
from when she hurt it last year.

It's the worst injury
he's seen in a long time.

Why, thanks, Doctor!

But the truth stares us in the face
and soon we must accept
that this is one that won't go away.

My heart aches for her -
my-used-to-be-little one
still little, really -
small but Fierce:

Horse Crazy
Basketball Crazy
then, after surgery
stir crazy
for six - SIX! - months.

I want to believe
that she will be whole again,
that something good will come of this,
that she will play ball
and ride horses

but it's hard to see
past my fears.

How Do I Write Thee?

2010-04-05T10:55:00.007-06:00

Pink Think: "You are just in the middle of a struggle with words which are really very stubborn things, with a blank page, with the (darn) thing that you use to write with, a pen or a typewriter, and you forget all about the reader when you are doing that." - Guillermo Cabrera Infante

photo: my laptop computer

Today, for a few minutes, the power went out. I was on the computer in the middle of my revision, and decided to stop writing so I won't drain my laptop's battery. I could have written longhand or on my Alphasmart, but I couldn't get myself to do it.

***
I've tried it all: long-hand, typing, writing on an Alphasmart, and writing on a computer.

Long-hand on pink paper gets me unstuck from writer's block. Though I feel productive, I usually change what I've written when I transfer the story onto my computer. But it's a great way to get back into writing.

Typing is cool (I grew up with a typewriter in my bedroom). Brian Jacques types his novels on a typewriter in his garden. Ernest Hemingway wrote his novels this way. I typed out a fun first chapter on an electric typewriter and could have kept going until I discovered that a) the ribbon is expensive and b) it's a lot of work to re-type onto the computer.

An Alphasmart is great to use camping, or in a truck when I am picking up kids. But it's hard to see the "big picture" with such a little window.

Hands down, I prefer the computer. Seeing the entire page helps me see the pacing of my story. The downside: the delete button and a wireless internet connection.

***
How do YOU write best?

Purging

2010-03-31T01:42:00.006-06:00

Pink Think: "Writing is not like painting where you add. It is not what you put on the canvas that the reader sees. Writing is more like a sculpture where you remove, you eliminate in order to make the work visible. Even those pages you remove somehow remain." - Elie Wiesel

photo by nicasaurusrex on flickr

I scrapped 3,003 words today from my revision when I didn't like how the plot line was going.

It's only a few days' worth of work.

Aaaaargh!

It's just going to make my novel better. Right? Right?

*deep breath*

Okay, back to work...

Spring (Heart) Break

2010-03-28T23:53:00.009-06:00

Pink Think: "Young alienation, disappointment and heartache is all a part of the first real growing up that we do." - Judd Nelson

photo by Janet Leadbeater on flickr

When I was 15, the summer between high school graduation and college, I went on a trip with some girlfriends to my friend's ancestral home in northern Philippines. It was my first time away from home.

For a couple of weeks, we flirted with boys who were home for the summer. We stayed up and shared secrets. We played cards. We swam at the beach. We went to a carnival. We could have just stared at a spot on the wall and it would still have been fun. I remember that trip as one of the highlights of my teenage years.

***
I think of this summer trip now as my heart aches for my oldest daughter, who is 14. Early in the year, her school put out information about a trip to DC over spring break (this week). She didn't take an envelope home then because she thought our family couldn't afford both a DC trip and a trip for her to Breyerfest in Kentucky this July. Her three close friends signed up for it.

As the trip got nearer and nearer, my daughter tried really hard to be happy for her friends, even though I could tell she was feeling left out. I didn't think it was a BIG deal until this past Friday, when she asked me, "If I had gone to DC, would I still have been able to go to Kentucky?" I told her, "Probably." Her face fell and regret was clearly written on it.

***
While she was at a science competition the next day (her friends had all flown out to DC that morning), a germ of an idea formed in my head. I made a few phone calls to find out if I could still have her catch up with the group, lining up a friend who was willing to pick her up at the airport and take her where she needs to be. After the competition, I told my daughter about my attempts to get her on the trip. She gave me a trembling, hopeful smile.

I wish I could say there is a happy ending to this story.

Eventually, the tour group operator advised me on the phone that it really wasn't going to work, not with having to get her on the itinerary for several reservations-only stops at such short notice. I finally conceded and hung up.

I watched as the hope on my daughter's face dissolved into fat tears.

***
Even though part of me knew it was a crazy proposition - we'd have had to spend $1,000 on last-minute airfare alone, and maybe another $1400 for the tour, not to mention my husband is away in the boonies helping at a sled dog race and so I hadn't consulted him yet -I wished I could have pulled off a miracle and put her on a direct flight to DC to meet up with her school group.

We both cried as I told her - no, promised her, that if there was ever anything like this that was at all humanly possible for us to help her with, I would do what I can. I told her I knew how disappointing it was to not be able to go. I told her how hard it will be to have her friends come back with memories that she would not share.

She's a good kid with a strong spirit. I know she will weather this disappointment. But I still wish I could have shielded her from it.

Romance

2010-03-23T07:16:00.006-06:00

Pink Think: "Romance is the glamour which turns the dust of everyday life into a golden haze."- Carolyn Gold Heilbrun

I've been on a reading kick lately, and my latest find has been Libba Bray's Victorian YA/light horror novels. I read Rebel Angels in one sitting (which left me wanting more about the romantic subplot of Gemma and Kartik).

***
I am a sucker for romance. Some of the books I enjoyed growing up were: Jane Eyre, Frenchman's Creek, Wuthering Heights, Gone With The Wind, and Little Women. I earmarked pages in Maeve Binchy's Glass Lake and Mary Stewart's Nine Coaches Waiting just to savor the romantic parts over and over.

The stories I write usually have a romantic sub-plot. Even my horror stories. My current novel has a forbidden romance, and I live for the days when I get to have my female protagonist verbally spar or make up with the hero. I wish I could just skip to these scenes altogether, but life's not always like that, you know? We still have to shop for groceries and clean the bathroom.

***
Yesterday, I checked out The Sweet Far Thing, the third novel in Libba Bray's trilogy. It's about 848 pages, and, I admit, I cheated. I skipped directly to scenes with Gemma and Kartik. Just to see what happens. And then (hopefully) I will go back and read the novel at leisure.

Tell me I'm not the only one that skips ahead.

Inspiration

2010-03-22T09:17:00.013-06:00

Pink Think: "Every person you admire, every person who has accomplished something in life, has overcome fear." - Cherrie Currie

Photo of my author-friend Karen Hoover playing a flute at a signing for her novel The Sapphire Flute

On Saturday, I attended a book reading/signing event for my author-friend Karen Hoover. She is such a giving, positive person. She deserves everything good coming her way. She read her first chapter to her debut novel The Sapphire Flute (click here for my review). Suspenseful, emotionally compelling passages. And her flute duet with Paulette Inman on harp was beautiful. Congratulations, Karen!!

***
I am reading Libba Bray's Rebel Angels. I didn't think I would like it, but I do! I love how she has strong female characters, mixes the supernatural with the Victorian age and puts in sly bits of humor. And that's just after reading the first six chapters of this "companion book" to her first bestselling novel A Great and Terrible Beauty. I cannot wait to see how Gemma's forbidden relationship with Kartik develops.

This past week, I also read the intense autobiography Neon Angel by Cherrie Currie. Cherrie Currie was the frontgirl of the '70s hard rock girl band The Runaways (Joan Jett was the guitarist; a movie recently came out based on this book). Cherrie Currie writes at the end:

Every person you admire, every person who has accomplished something in life - doctors, lawyers, writers, movie stars, scientists - has overcome fear. Each one of them has dared to risk failure for a chance at success. It wasn't until I faced my fears without alcohol and drugs that I began down the road to my life of today; a happy, healthy life filled with the magic of possibility.

***
It's been a full week for me of inspiration from other writers. Like Libba Bray, Karen Hoover and Cherrie Currie, we can face our fears, believe in ourselves, and make our dreams happen.

Whom do YOU admire and why?

Spring Cleaning

2010-03-18T08:49:00.005-06:00

Pink Think: "Behold, my friends, the spring is come; the earth has gladly received the embraces of the sun, and we shall soon see the results of their love!" - Sitting Bull

art from the Gilroy Dispatch

Yesterday, I took a break from writing and cleared the clutter in my bedroom. Then, with my kids' help, I cleared my flower beds of the dead stuff from the winter. In a few weeks, my tulips will be blooming once again.

Spring cleaning: it's one of those things I hate to do but I'm always glad after the fact.

(We are also in the process of looking for horse property and putting up our house for sale, so I had a second purpose other than clearing out the junk.)

As I sifted through my piles, I unearthed a manuscript of one of my earliest novels from four years ago, Ghost Moon Night. I read my dedication to my oldest daughter "for believing". She got me through that one, with her excitement and suggestions. I hefted it in my hands and I honestly could not remember the angst I went through to get that story into its final form. Like childbirth. :-)

I was a little sad for this story that never saw the light of day, but I took a deep breath, patted it fondly and stored it in my proverbial trunk. Even if it may never be published, I still love that baby.

I am still writing, but I am no longer wild-eyed about it. My obsessive compulsion is spent and I am taking a more sane approach to this art. There is a house to clean, a yard to tidy up, and a family to enjoy.

Joy

2010-03-11T14:02:00.006-07:00

Pink Think: "I enjoy writing, sometimes; I think that most writers will tell you about the agony of writing more than the joy of writing, but writing is what I was meant to do." - Leon Uris

photo by photocillin on flickr

I sit in my little writing corner and type out words in silence except for the tapping of my fingers on the keyboard and the tick-ticking of the kitchen clock, as well as the occasional shifting of sleeping dogs in their open crates.

I am awash with gratitude to have the chance to do this for the bulk of my day. The past couple of hours has been pure joy. I wish I don't have to stop, but it is almost time to leave to pick up my daughter.

I want to pocket this day and keep it for the other days when maybe I forget why I chose to pursue this writing life.

Mo(u)rning Pages

2010-03-08T14:11:00.006-07:00

Pink Think: "There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed." - Ernest Hemingway

photo from photografica.com.au

I wish I could say I'm on top of the world
But it's hard to see past the pages
and pages
and pages.

Of hard-scrabbling work and lonely hours
No guarantees even, and a million scars
Of almosts
just waits
and hang in theres.

Number four or is it five?
I've lost count as books tick past
Like a clock on the last turn
of a screw that I want to lose on purpose

because

it is that kind of day
where I write and write
yet I have little to show for
than just desire and some pages.

White Heat

2010-03-02T10:19:00.007-07:00

Pink Think: "Before the reward there must be labor. You plant before you harvest. You sow in tears before you reap joy." - Ralph Ransom

photo from esctoday.com

Nice to finally turn in a couple of first chapters for a contest yesterday. Until the deadline, I was still tweaking my pages. Such a relief to be done so that I could just go into the city and celebrate my youngest's tenth birthday at Old Spaghetti Factory with the family.

***
I am finishing a novel right now that is near and dear to my heart. 33,000 words in about a week so far - writing it in a white heat. Crazy I know, and is making me a burnout candidate, but it is wonderful to just get the story out while it is fresh in my mind.

Looking forward to finishing it, because when I am done, I have promised myself some sticky rice dessert from a Thai restaurant.

There you have it. I am throwing the gauntlet down!

***
What project are YOU working on and what reward will you give yourself when you are done?

The Sapphire Flute: Review & Giveaway

2010-03-01T00:01:00.008-07:00

Pink Think: "The first vision I had of this story was of a girl standing outside of her crude tent in the dark, playing a glowing blue flute under the full moon when a white wolf crossed the river and watched her play." - Karen Hoover on what inspired her debut YA fantasy novel The Sapphire Flute

Update: Thanks to random.org, we have a winner. Congratulations to BJ of After the Blackbird Sings! He wins an ARC of The Sapphire Flute courtesy of Valor Publishing.

Today, I have the cool honor of reviewing Karen Hoover's debut YA fantasy novel The Sapphire Flute. Karen, a talented writer, is also my friend and writer's-group colleague.

The chapters alternate between the stories of Ember (a shapeshifter) and Kayla (the guardian of the Sapphire Flute), two girls who are just discovering their true magical powers. There are also occasional chapters from the point-of-view of the villain, C'Tan, who will stop at nothing to get the Sapphire Flute as it is one of the keystones for good...or evil.

***
I was all set to read The Sapphire Flute one evening when my 14 year old daughter picked it up and said, "Can I look at it?" I said, "Sure." I didn't see it again until the next day. She had read it in one sitting. She gave me permission to share her thoughts on The Sapphire Flute:

Very good. Creative. Lots of the same elements as other fantasies (ex. Tamora Pierce), but is fresh and "clean" (no inappropriate stuff). I really like Ember. I liked the different colors and the white magic stuff. That was cool. The constant shift of view is a little confusing, but creative. I really don't like the cover too much though...otherwise, I really enjoyed it and stayed up till 12:30 to finish reading it!

***
I do not normally read fantasy, but, like my daughter, I was drawn into The Sapphire Flute's unique world.

My favorites: the running thread of musical metaphors, Ember's shape-shifting abilities and her wolfpack adventures, and the explosive confrontation between Kayla and C'Tan, involving dragons (Yes, dragons!). The alternating points of view between Ember, Kayla and the villain, kept the plot interesting. The romance between Kayla and Brant didn't ring true at times, but this romance junkie welcomed that sub-plot.

Bottom line: I kept turning the pages to see what happens next. Karen builds the suspense with plenty of twists and brings it to a satisfying conclusion. If you read this book, be prepared to stay up...unless of course your 14-year-old gets hold of it first.

You can read more about Karen Hoover on her blog, and her publisher's website.

***
GIVEAWAY!!! To be eligible for a drawing of an Advance Reader's Edition of The Sapphire Flute, answer this question:

What musical instrument/s do YOU play? And/or what do you wish you could learn to play?

Entry deadline: Monday, March 8, 2010, midnight. U.S. addresses only. Thanks to Valor Publishing Group for the copy!

Optimism

2010-02-25T08:17:00.005-07:00

Pink Think: "If I keep a green bough in my heart, the singing bird will come." – Chinese Proverb

photo from maniacworld

A conversation between my nine year old daughter and my husband:

Nine year old: You know how I'm saving up for a ferret?
Dad: Yeah?
Nine year old: Mom's not really going to let me have one even if I have the money for it, is she?
Dad: Probably not.
Nine year old: Oh well. I'll still keep saving up for it.